Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that the best way to discourage smoking is to make smoking illegal in public places. Other people say that this is not enough and that other measures are needed.

Discuss both these views, and give your opinion.

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Well,I think that just making smoking iilegal in public places is not sufficient to discourge it.A lot places like the hospitals,shopping malls,airports had already declared to not do smoking in the premises.So,there is definetly a need to adopt some other measures to discourage smoking.

Although,the government had taken a number of measures to limit smoking like making people aware about its health hazards by giving a clear guideline to the manufacturers to print a warning on the the packets.But they are not quite enough to control the current trend of smoking.Many social organisations are working at their own to make people cautious about its ill effects.These organisations are encouraging and motivating the addicted youth to just get off from the trap of smokers and from smoking too.

Yesterday,while I was returing from my office I found some teenagers of my society standing on the road side with having cigarates in ther hands.I felt so disappointed that now the smoking is also exploiting our young generation.

Many smoking bars are opened in the cities those just offer an comfertable area and drugs for smoking which encourages the smokers.Lastly, I would like to say that it is the high time to take strict action on such activities and smugglers those are targeting specially the teenages of our society.Soley making it iilegal is not going work.Furthermore the government should also motivate the volunteers working in the antismoking organisations.Give them rewards to appriciate their efforts and actions.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You give a clear overall opinion that banning smoking in public places is not sufficient, and you mention several relevant additional measures, including health warnings, awareness campaigns, and action against smoking venues. However, the discussion is uneven: the case for making smoking illegal in public places is only briefly acknowledged through examples of places that already prohibit it, rather than explained as a way to protect others or discourage smokers. Several points, such as the teenagers you saw and the role of organisations, are introduced but not developed with clear explanation. The response also falls seven words short of the required minimum. To strengthen the answer, explain both views more fully and show how each proposed measure could reduce smoking.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable progression: it states your position, gives examples of existing measures, and then argues for further action. Paragraphing helps separate the opening from the supporting points, and connectors such as “Although,” “Lastly,” and “Furthermore” signal relationships between ideas. However, the organisation is not consistently clear. The paragraph beginning “Although” combines government warnings, social organisations, and youth addiction without clearly distinguishing the points, while the personal anecdote shifts the focus abruptly. Some linking is mechanical, and the final recommendations arrive as a list rather than a developed conclusion. Group related ideas into focused paragraphs and use clearer references to show how each example supports your argument.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “health hazards,” “warning,” “addicted,” “smugglers,” and “anti-smoking organisations,” which helps communicate your main concerns. There is also an attempt to use more specific language about public venues and young people. However, the range is limited and several spelling and word-choice errors make the writing less clear, for example “iilegal,” “discourge,” “definetly,” “cigarates,” and “comfertable.” Some combinations are also unnatural, such as “get off from the trap of smokers” and “declared to not do smoking.” Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully. More precise terms such as “smoking ban,” “cessation support,” and “enforce restrictions” would help express your ideas efficiently.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a few complex structures, including the opening contrast with “Although” and the sentence beginning “while I was returning from my office.” These show an effort to vary sentence forms. However, many sentences contain errors in verb forms, articles, agreement, and sentence construction, which sometimes make the intended meaning difficult to follow. For example, “the government had taken” is not the appropriate tense for a general current situation, and “Many smoking bars are opened” has an incorrect passive construction. The sentence “I found some teenagers … standing … with having” is also structurally faulty. Punctuation and spacing around commas and full stops are inconsistent. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then add subordinate clauses and check each sentence for a clear subject and verb.

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