Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Barron's Writing · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that the best way to discourage smoking is to make smoking illegal in public places. Other people say that this is not enough and that other measures are needed.

Discuss both these views, and give your opinion.

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

it has been claimed that, the most effective strategy to inhibit the rate of smoking is to prohibits the act of smoking in the society while others argued that ,this alone is not effiecient,other parameters should be adopted.In my view,i strongly agree that,other methods should be put to practise and this essay is aimed at discusing both views

People may tend to avoid public places,due to reason of awareness of law enforcement agencies carrying out investigations to apprehend them for smoking , as against the law.This measure may be productive but cannot profer effective solution to this problem. For example,an addicted smoker may choose to smoke in an enclosed places such as their living rooms and hotels as long as they have the resources

On the contrary,other parameters are suggested to be put to use,Which includes prohibiting the manufacturing and sales of cigarette sticks to public which in turn will help reduce the availabilty of this product.Also there should an awareness to the public on the effect of smoking to the health ,which will make smokers make informed decisions about their life choices.Examples having placards with an inscription "Smokers are liable to die young" and listed health hazards on the major streets.

In conclusion,policies and various strategies should be implemented to have a decline in the population rate of smokers Whilst the act of smoking is illegalised,In other to achieve an effective result and a better society,it is believed that alternative measures as well as option should be in put into practise .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both views and make your position clear: you argue that banning smoking in public places may help, but that additional measures are needed. The example of an addicted smoker moving to a private room explains why a public ban may not solve the problem, while restricting cigarette sales and raising health awareness represent the other view. These are relevant ideas, but some are less fully developed than others. For instance, the proposed restriction on manufacturing and sales is asserted to reduce availability, but you do not explain how practical or effective it would be. The awareness campaign example is also brief. To strengthen the response, explain the likely impact of each measure and support your opinion with a more specific example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, a paragraph explaining the limits of public-place bans, a paragraph presenting other measures, and a conclusion. This gives the reader a logical route through both views. You also use signposting such as “For example,” “On the contrary,” and “In conclusion.” However, some connections are mechanical or unclear. “On the contrary” suggests a direct contradiction, although the next paragraph adds complementary measures; “In addition” would fit better. The opening sentence is difficult to follow because several ideas run together, and the conclusion repeats the recommendation without clearly summarising the two arguments. Clearer sentence boundaries and more precise links between ideas would make the progression smoother.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “law enforcement agencies,” “apprehend,” “manufacturing,” “availability,” and “health hazards.” This shows an effort to use more formal and specific language. However, inaccurate word forms, spelling, and collocations are noticeable and sometimes make the meaning less natural: “prohibits” should be “prohibit,” “effiecient” is misspelled, and “population rate of smokers” is an awkward expression. Phrases such as “other parameters” and “put to use” are also less precise than the context requires. Aim for accurate, natural combinations rather than choosing formal-sounding words; proofreading spelling and checking collocations would improve clarity.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a reason clause beginning “as long as” and a relative clause in “which in turn will help reduce…”. However, control is uneven, and errors in verb forms, articles, agreement, and sentence construction sometimes make the reader work to understand the point. For example, “the most effective strategy … is to prohibits” has an incorrect verb form, while “there should an awareness” is missing a verb. The opening sentence also joins several clauses without clear punctuation, and the final sentence contains an unclear construction. Practise building complete sentences with one main idea, then check subject–verb agreement, articles, and punctuation before adding complex clauses.

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