Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Barron's Writing · 2026-08-03
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that the best way to discourage smoking is to make smoking illegal in public places. Other people say that this is not enough and that other measures are needed.
Discuss both these views, and give your opinion.
Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 7.0)
In this contempary era, society tens to get pulled towards anything that can give them a dopamine boost and one of those thing is smoking. From a really young age individuals are picking up smoking as a way to assimilate with the society or sometimes just to get through certain situations. Now since it is widely known now that how harmful smoking can be for one's health, people often argue how can it be discouraged.
On one hand, People recommend that making smoking illegal in public places is the best way to make people leave smoking. This approach can be really effective as individuals usually tend to smoke in a social gathering and that sometimes also make non-smokers join them so they don't fell left out. But some people also just smoke to get through their emotional stuff like someone going through breakup might pickup this habit as a distraction.
Now on the other hand, Individuals suggest more measures are needed to control the smoking problem as just making it illegal in public won't stop people from actually smoking as we can see from the example of certian drugs. Although they are illegal, It excites people more to try it out. So we do need other measures like teaching younger generation in schools that how harmful smoking can be and more strict restrictions on how cigrattes are being sold so that it never gets into a underage individual hands.
To conclude, In my opinion there is not one best method to solve this problem and a multi-step approach is needed which includes multiple methods like new laws, awareness campaigns, etc.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 7.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0
You have addressed all parts of the prompt by discussing both views and providing a clear personal opinion. The ideas are relevant, such as the social aspect of smoking and the need for educational campaigns. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the point about 'certain drugs' is a good comparison, but it could be expanded further to explain why prohibition fails in those contexts. To reach a higher band, ensure that each supporting point is fully explained with more depth and specific examples, rather than moving quickly between points. Your position is consistent throughout the essay, which is a strength.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0
The essay is logically organized into four paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your argument. You use basic cohesive devices like 'On one hand' and 'On the other hand' to signal shifts in perspective. However, the transition between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the flow could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words and phrases. Additionally, some referencing is slightly unclear, such as the phrase 'one of those thing' in the introduction. Improving the use of cohesive devices to connect ideas within paragraphs would enhance the overall flow and coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'assimilate', 'dopamine boost', and 'multi-step approach'. However, there are several spelling errors, such as 'contempary', 'cigrattes', and 'certian', which detract from the quality of the writing. Additionally, some word choices are slightly informal or imprecise, such as 'emotional stuff' and 'pickup this habit'. To improve, focus on using more academic vocabulary and ensure you proofread for spelling accuracy. Expanding your range to include more precise collocations would also help elevate your score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is appropriate for this level. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('society tens to', 'one of those thing is') and punctuation errors, particularly with comma splices and capitalization. While these errors do not generally impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically ensuring that verbs agree with their subjects and that punctuation is used correctly to separate independent clauses.
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