Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-09-05
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that the best way to discourage smoking is to make smoking illegal in public places. Other people say that this is not enough and that other measures are needed.
Discuss both these views, and give your opinion.
Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
There are split opinions regarding discourage smoking. Some people believe that smoking shoud be illegal in public areas. Whereas, other group of thinkers argue that more measures are needed because just illegal in public areas is not enough. Before commenting on my opinion, this essay would discuss both the sides along with a logical inference.
At the outset, talking about the illegal smoking in public areas can discourage the smoker. That has many reasons, firstly is related to enclosed shopping centers because that smoke is extremely harmful for people especially for kids and elderly people. Moreover, kids can quit learn everything quickly. For instence, 5 year old kid understand everything and learn to copy what the see. Furthermore, some people who are not fit or suffrering from some ilnesses like asthma in public places, so that is harmful for those people too. Moreover, smoker can get some smoke free time with their family and enjoy the fresh air and clean environment.
On the contrary, the other group of people counter claim the mentioned statement. According to them government should make some more rule and regulations like they can increase selling prices, implement more tax, prohibited for people who is working with kids or elderly people and many more. the one is increase selling price can work because if they have to pay more than they will try to avoid.
Thus to wrap up the discussion
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The essay fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the task achievement score. While you have attempted to address both views, the response is incomplete, ending abruptly without a conclusion. The ideas presented, such as the impact on children and the suggestion of increased taxes, are relevant but remain under-developed due to the lack of a full discussion and a final summary. To improve, ensure you fully develop each paragraph with clear supporting evidence and provide a balanced conclusion that clearly states your own opinion, as required by the prompt.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay shows some attempt at logical organization with clear paragraph breaks. However, the flow is hindered by the incomplete nature of the text. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'At the outset', 'Moreover', and 'On the contrary', but they are sometimes used mechanically. The lack of a conclusion means the essay lacks a sense of closure, which is a key requirement for coherence. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next, leading to a well-structured final summary.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You rely on basic phrasing such as 'split opinions' and 'make some more rule'. There are also some errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'illegal smoking' (instead of 'banning smoking') and 'suffrering from some ilnesses'. To achieve a higher score, try to incorporate more topic-specific vocabulary related to public policy and health, and work on using more sophisticated collocations to express your ideas more naturally and precisely.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'just illegal in public areas is not enough' (missing a noun or verb), 'kids can quit learn everything' (incorrect verb form), and 'smoker can get' (missing article). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, correct article usage, and ensuring that your complex sentences are grammatically sound. Proofreading for basic errors like 'shoud' and 'instence' will also help improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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