Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that the best way to discourage smoking is to make smoking illegal in public places. Other people say that this is not enough and that other measures are needed.

Discuss both these views, and give your opinion.

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

some individuals believe that one of the best way to prohibit smoking in public places is to label it illegal. Others aruge that other measures should be taken to reduce smoking activity as only marking the place illegal is not enough. I will be discussing both point of views in my essay.

In my opinion, the former statment is not that powerful the later can be deal by taking cerain measures.

On the one hand, it has observed that in most of the public places there are certain banners, on which it is written for public awarness that no smoking is allowed in this areas however, many indiviuals are not strictly following those instructions and continuue to smoke.Consequently, making the surrounding area more dangerous for common people.For example

in the malls ,parks and hospitals smoking is strictly prohibited but most of the people enjoy doing passive smoking that is hazourdous for health.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response addresses the task only partially and falls significantly short of the required word count, containing only 152 words instead of the minimum 250. The writer attempts to discuss both views regarding smoking bans and provide an opinion, but the ideas remain very limited and under-developed. For instance, the introduction states an intent to discuss both points of view, but the body paragraph cuts off abruptly after attempting to give an example about malls, parks, and hospitals. Furthermore, the position is not always clearly sustained throughout the brief text. To improve towards a higher band, you must ensure you write at least 250 words and fully develop your arguments with well-reasoned explanations and fully formed examples rather than leaving thoughts incomplete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is some basic organisation attempted through standard transition phrases such as 'On the one hand', but the overall response lacks a clear logical progression because the essay stops prematurely. Paragraphing is initiated with a traditional introductory approach and a single body paragraph, but the abrupt termination hinders overall cohesion. Cohesive devices are minimal and sometimes repetitive. Referencing is occasionally unclear, such as when referring back to previous statements using phrases that lack precise antecedents. To achieve a higher level of coherence and cohesion, you need to structure a complete essay with a clear introduction, at least two distinct body paragraphs exploring both views fully, and a conclusive summary, ensuring logical flow from one idea to the next using a variety of cohesive links naturally.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is limited and minimally adequate for conveying basic meaning, but contains noticeable errors in word choice, word form, and spelling that occasionally cause difficulty for the reader. For example, the student writes 'aruge' instead of 'argue', uses 'statment' instead of 'statement', and misspells 'hazourdous' instead of 'hazardous'. Additionally, the phrase 'doing passive smoking' is an unnatural collocation; a native speaker would say 'subjected to passive smoking' or 'inhaling secondhand smoke'. To move up to a higher band, you should expand your range of vocabulary, practice correct spelling of common academic words, and focus on natural collocations rather than relying on basic or direct translations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writer demonstrates a limited range of sentence structures, relying mostly on simple sentences or faulty attempts at complex ones. Frequent errors in grammar, articles, and pluralisation occur throughout the text, such as 'one of the best way' (should be 'ways'), 'in this areas' (should be 'these areas'), and 'continuue to smoke' (incorrect verb form and spelling). Punctuation and capitalization are also inconsistent, as seen at the beginning of sentences. These frequent errors cause some difficulty for the reader. To improve your grammatical range and accuracy, you should focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement, accurate use of plural nouns following phrases like 'one of the', and constructing complex sentences with fewer foundational errors.

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