Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Barron's Writing · 2026-10-10
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that the best way to discourage smoking is to make smoking illegal in public places. Other people say that this is not enough and that other measures are needed.
Discuss both these views, and give your opinion.
Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In recent years, smoking continues to increase, especially in teenagers and the result is highly concerning. It has become a threat to our society, therefore it is very important to take sufficient steps to control. I largerly agree that banning of smoking at public areas is not sufficient, the government must take other initiatives to reduce smoking.
It could be argued that banning of smoking from public places can creat a postive impact on controlling the number of smokers. The authorities must charge fine against rule breaker and public get scared that smoking is punishable. Hence, it can help in discouraging the people.
However, I would argue that awareness is also a key factor to control the smoking. The schools and other educational institution should conduct campaging to explain the dangerous health issues which can happen due to smoking, Furthermore, showing data that how many people are suffering from dangerous diseases like cancer which is totally incurable.
Moreover, social media can also do wonders. Explaining the problems with smoking can be better step for society. People are addicted to adapting celebraties life styles. Therefore, they can get easily influced by them, which is very helpful in reducing the interest in smoking.
In conclusion, smoking is hazardous to health and it is responsiblity of everyone like government, higher authorities and educational institution to participate for the well being
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You present a clear view that banning smoking in public places is not enough, and you discuss both the ban and additional measures such as school awareness campaigns and social media. These are relevant responses to the question. However, the discussion of the first view is brief: the claim that fines may discourage smokers is not supported with an example or explanation of how effective this would be. The social-media point is also unclear, particularly how celebrities could reduce interest in smoking. The conclusion restates the general need for action but does not clearly summarise your position. The response is 23 words below the required minimum, and the ideas would benefit from fuller explanation and support.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the public-place ban and other measures, and a conclusion. Linking expressions such as “However,” “Furthermore,” and “Moreover” help signal the movement between ideas, and the reader can follow the main argument. To make the progression more convincing, develop each paragraph around a clearer sequence of claim, explanation, and example. For instance, the paragraph on social media moves from celebrity lifestyles to reducing smoking without explaining the connection. Some links are also mechanical or unclear, such as “Hence” after the point about fines. The final sentence is incomplete, which weakens the sense of closure.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use a relevant range of topic vocabulary, including “public places,” “awareness,” “health issues,” “addicted,” and “hazardous to health.” This is enough to communicate the main ideas, but the range is limited and several spelling and word-choice errors reduce precision. Examples include “largerly,” “creat,” “campaging,” “celebraties,” and “influced.” Some phrases are also unnatural, such as “charge fine against rule breaker” and “adapting celebraties life styles.” Aim for accurate collocations and more precise wording when describing policy and health effects. Proofreading spelling and choosing natural phrases would make your argument clearer and more fluent.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a conditional-style explanation of the effect of fines and clauses introduced by “which” and “that.” However, control is uneven, and errors sometimes make relationships between ideas difficult to follow. For example, “In recent years, smoking continues to increase” mixes a time expression with an unsuitable tense, while “the government must take other initiatives” follows a comma splice in the opening paragraph. The sentence beginning “Furthermore, showing data…” is a fragment rather than a complete sentence, and the conclusion also lacks a completed final clause. Practise checking tense, sentence boundaries, articles, and subject–verb agreement, and ensure each sentence has a clear main clause.
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