Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that the best way to discourage smoking is to make smoking illegal in public places. Other people say that this is not enough and that other measures are needed.

Discuss both these views, and give your opinion.

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Opinions differ in whether the best method to stop smoking is make it illegal or other measures are required . This essay will discuss both opposite view point alsong wih my personal perception in upcoming paragrapghs.

One of the prominent advantages to make smoking illegal in public ares is reducing the number of cigratte lovers. As a matter of fact, they will surely scared to smoking in public areas such as bus stop, train station and airport.Beacause of this, they can save thier lives as cigrattes put adverse impact on people's lungs. Due to this, they have to spend huge chunk of money to keep them safe. Not only this, if smoking become illegal, sellers are likely to stop selling drugs. To exemplify, In India , all the shopkeepers are not keeping cigarates as they afraid of police .Therefore, consumer do not have any chance to buy illegal items such as cigrattes.

On the paradoxical side, there are another useful measures which are definetely required to discourage smoking. Firstly, increasing the price of cigrattes is the best method. In fact, individuals are keep buying such drugs beacuse they all are affordable specifically cigrattes .The second step which we cannot overlooked is awareness. Government had better provide camps in each corner of the world to enhance the knowledge about the health fitness. As there is no doubt that the vast majority of people do not know about the side effects of smoking such as Cancer. If they know deeply about it , they will suely try to avoid to consume it.As a consequence, they can stay healthy and emotional well-being.

To conclude, it is clear that banning on cigrattes is not only the best method , increasing the price and awareness is the the other sinificant method to reduce the consumtion of smoking.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both views and give a position: the first body paragraph argues for making smoking illegal in public, while the second proposes higher prices and awareness campaigns, and the conclusion says a ban alone is insufficient. These points are relevant, and examples such as public transport locations and India help illustrate them. However, some claims are unclear or insufficiently supported. For instance, the claim that a public-place ban would make shopkeepers stop selling cigarettes shifts from public smoking to sales without explaining the connection. The awareness argument also asserts that people may not know smoking causes cancer, but does not develop how campaigns would change behaviour. Explain these links and make your own preferred combination of measures more explicit to strengthen the response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable four-paragraph structure, with an introduction, separate discussion of the two views, and a conclusion. This gives the reader an overall route through the argument, and signposts such as “On the paradoxical side” and “To conclude” indicate transitions. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical, and some links between ideas are unclear. In the first body paragraph, the move from preventing public smoking to shopkeepers stopping sales is abrupt; “Because of this” does not clearly identify what consequence it refers to. The second paragraph also relies on a sequence of “Firstly,” “The second step,” and “As a consequence,” rather than showing the precise relationship between claims. Use clearer referencing and connect each example directly to the point it supports.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “discourage smoking,” “adverse impact,” “awareness,” and “side effects,” and you attempt some less common expressions. However, inaccurate word choice, collocation, and spelling are noticeable and sometimes make the meaning harder to follow. Examples include “cigratte lovers,” “health fitness,” “emotional well-being,” and “banning on cigrattes”; these are not natural or precise expressions in this context. Repeated use of “cigrattes” and “smoking” also limits flexibility, while misspellings such as “definetely” and “consumtion” reduce accuracy. Build a reliable set of topic-specific phrases and check spelling, choosing natural combinations such as “cigarette smokers,” “health risks,” and “ban on smoking in public places.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a conditional structure (“if smoking become illegal”) and a reason clause (“As there is no doubt…”). The overall meaning is usually recoverable, but errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction occur across the response. For example, “individuals are keep buying” needs a corrected verb pattern, and “if smoking become illegal” requires agreement. The sentence beginning “As there is no doubt” is a fragment, while “they will surely scared to smoking” combines an incorrect verb form with an unsuitable grammatical pattern. Punctuation and spacing are also inconsistent, particularly around full stops and commas. Practise accurate clause construction and verb patterns, then proofread each sentence for a complete main clause.

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