Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Barron's Writing · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that the best way to discourage smoking is to make smoking illegal in public places. Other people say that this is not enough and that other measures are needed.

Discuss both these views, and give your opinion.

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Smoking in public places has been a controversial topic for many years. Few governments imposed strict laws to discourage smoking in public places. Many people believe that this approach is enough to limit smoking addiction however, I beleive that this is one of crucial step to discourage smoking but not enough.

To begin with, smoking is bad for health not only for the one who smoke but also for those who are in surrounding. Passive smokers are at more risk because of unfiltered particles that they inhale from air. To protect the public from hazard particles, it is best approach to make smoking illegal in public places.

In addition to this, this will also limit smokers to smoke more because they have to find separate places for smoking. It would be difficult for them so they will quit their habit eventually.

However, this is not enough. Government should also arrange seminars and raise awareness among general public . Educating society can make a big difference. Moreover, there should be enough rehabilitation centres for those who are active smokers. With the help of proper guidance and emotional support one can quit smoking. Rehabilitation centres offer practical approach to one who want to quit smoking.

Another way to limit smoking is to increase tax and fine on smoking industry. This approach alone can have significant effects. In Pakistan, new goverment increased taxes on tobbaco industries. This approach has effectively decreased consumption of tobacco.

In conclusion, I beleive that long term policies and monitoring is necessary to limit consumption of tobbacco in addition to make smoking illegal in public places.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both views and give a clear opinion: making public smoking illegal is useful, but it should be combined with other measures. The discussion of passive smoking explains the case for public-place restrictions, while seminars, rehabilitation centres, and higher taxes provide relevant alternatives. The Pakistan example also helps make the tax point more concrete. This meets the task well, though the support is uneven: the claim that smokers will eventually quit because finding a separate place is difficult is asserted rather than explained, and the tax example would be stronger with a clearer account of how the policy reduced consumption. Developing these points with specific reasoning would make the response more fully supported and precise.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph supporting public-place bans, a paragraph presenting additional measures, and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “To begin with,” “However,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the argument. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical, and the paragraph about additional measures contains several ideas—education, rehabilitation, and taxation—that are not linked or developed in a consistent progression. Some references are also unclear, as in “This approach alone,” where the intended approach could be stated more explicitly. Use transitions that show the relationship between ideas, and organise each paragraph around one main point with explanation and an example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “passive smokers,” “rehabilitation centres,” “emotional support,” and “consumption,” which allows you to discuss health and policy measures. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “long term policies and monitoring.” However, several word-choice and collocation problems reduce precision: “limit smoking addiction,” “hazard particles,” and “taxes on tobbaco industries” are not natural expressions in this context. Spelling errors such as “beleive,” “ goverment,” and “tobbaco” are noticeable. Aim for accurate, natural combinations and check spelling carefully; this would make the vocabulary more flexible and reliable.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple sentences and some more complex forms, including “Although” is not needed here, but the sentence beginning “because they have to find separate places” shows an attempt to explain cause and effect. Most ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors recur. For example, “the one who smoke” has a subject–verb agreement error, and “those who are in surrounding” needs a more complete noun phrase. The sentence “Many people believe that this approach is enough to limit smoking addiction however, I beleive…” also needs clearer punctuation between the contrasting clauses. Review agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries, then proofread longer sentences to improve control while retaining varied structures.

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