Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Barron's Writing · 2026-08-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that physical education classes are an important part of a child's education. Others believe that it is more important to focus on academics during school time.

Discuss both these views, and give your opinion.

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this contemporary era, a group of people believe that physical education is far important for child's education. Whilst, some individuals think that focusing on their academics is more important during school time. However, i agree with the latter view and the reason behind my belief is further discussed in the following paragraphs.

To start with, focusing on academics is very crucial during the development of their child through the schooling. As, their child can learn many skills, values, morals and many more things during that time. And all this things together leads to personality development of their child. If they were not focus properly on those things their child might be develop an antisocial behaviour. For example, academic curiculum includes lectures like personality development, and in this classes students are basically allow to do debate on some given topics which directly strengthen their confidence and improve their communication skills through this classes. Moreover, academics provide them a room to learn about their country's history, scientist who contribute their life for innovation and many more things they can learn through academics. To excemplify this, recent study shown 70% of students are learning science, Math, History from their school.

On the other hand, people who believe physical education classes are important to engage their child in a physical activity which helps them to be physically active, as a physical activity like swimming and karate has good benefits which help their child to be physically active. And some child are very good at this who can make career in it and make their country proud. Example, there are many sports runner who is not good at studies but good at sports make their career in it and earned huge respect by serving their whole future to their country.

In conclusion, focusing on the child's academic during their school time is very important as that stage is their development stage from their they can learn many things like personality development, history and scientific innovation strategy in past. While, physical education is important for developing physical morale and it is important for those can see their career in sports and have no interest in studies.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both views and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While the argument for academics is supported with examples, the explanation of how these classes specifically foster 'personality development' is a bit repetitive. The discussion on physical education is also somewhat superficial, relying on generalizations about sports careers. To reach a higher band, you should aim to provide more nuanced arguments—for example, discussing how physical education contributes to mental health or teamwork, rather than just focusing on professional sports careers. The position is consistent, but the depth of analysis could be improved to fully satisfy the requirements of a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the argument. You use some cohesive devices like 'To start with,' 'Moreover,' and 'On the other hand.' However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly unnatural. For instance, the transition 'Whilst, some individuals' at the start is grammatically awkward. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as the use of 'all this things' and 'from their they can learn.' Improving the variety and accuracy of your linking words and ensuring that pronouns clearly refer back to their antecedents will help improve the flow and logical progression of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You rely on basic phrasing such as 'many more things' and 'very good at this,' which limits the sophistication of your argument. There are also some errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'physical morale' (which is not a standard term in this context) and 'academic curiculum.' To improve, focus on using more precise academic vocabulary and collocations. For example, instead of 'make career,' use 'pursue a professional career.' Expanding your range of synonyms will help you express your ideas more effectively.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'all this things,' 'recent study shown'), article usage (e.g., 'in this classes'), and sentence fragments or run-on sentences. For example, 'As, their child can learn...' is an incomplete thought. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. You should focus on proofreading for basic errors like pluralization and verb tense consistency, and practice constructing more complex sentences with accurate punctuation.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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