Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Barron's Writing · 2026-08-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that physical education classes are an important part of a child's education. Others believe that it is more important to focus on academics during school time.

Discuss both these views, and give your opinion.

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is an undeniable fact that some people say that physical education is a crucial part of children's education. Whereas others believe that academics during school time is also important for learners. This essay will discuss both views before reaching an opinion.

To commence with, physical education classes are important for children. The foremost reason for this is that children nowadays are living in a fast-paced life; they do not have time at home to do any physical activities. by virtue of that, children sit in front of the television for a while, and illnesses as well as obesity amongst youngsters are increasing day by day. For instance, a recent article in the Tribune stated that physical activity amongst young children has increased by 70% in the recent couple of years, and due to that, health issues are rising. Therefore, physical education should be a mandatory subject in schools.

On the other hand, academics cannot be ignored; children are the backbone of our future. furthermore, there should be more academic subjects if youngsters are well educated today, then only they can find a better job tomorrow. For example, academic competition is increasing every day; it has increased by 80% internationally. Hence, it is more important to focus on academics.

In my opinion, physical education cannot be denied; I think it is more crucial to focus on academics during school time. In addition, if children study well academically, then they would be able to compete with the world and would be able to find a better job and survive in the future.

To conclude, physical education is important as the disease among students is increasing and they are not doing any physical activity at home. but academic is more essential, as in this modern world there is nothing without academics.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the argument for academics relies on vague claims about 'international competition' and 'better jobs' without explaining how academic focus specifically benefits a child's development compared to physical education. The supporting examples, such as the 70% and 80% statistics, appear fabricated and lack a logical connection to the broader educational context. To reach a higher band, you should focus on explaining the 'why' and 'how' behind your arguments rather than relying on unsupported statistics.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas. You use some cohesive devices like 'To commence with,' 'On the other hand,' and 'In conclusion' to signal the structure. However, some transitions feel mechanical or slightly misused, such as 'by virtue of that' to start a sentence. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear; for example, the link between the rise in physical activity and the rise in health issues in your second paragraph is contradictory and confusing. Improving the flow between sentences would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to convey your meaning clearly. You use some topic-specific terms like 'mandatory subject' and 'backbone of our future.' However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are instances of awkward word choice, such as 'disease among students is increasing' (where 'health issues' or 'sedentary lifestyle problems' would be more precise) and 'there is nothing without academics.' To improve, try to incorporate more precise collocations and a wider variety of academic vocabulary to express complex ideas more naturally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent errors in punctuation and grammar. For example, you often start sentences with lowercase letters after a period (e.g., 'by virtue of that'), and there are issues with subject-verb agreement and article usage, such as 'academic is more essential.' The use of 'if... then' structures is a good attempt at complexity, but the overall control is inconsistent. Focusing on proofreading for basic errors like capitalization and pluralization will significantly improve your score.

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