Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Barron's Writing · 2026-08-13
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that physical education classes are an important part of a child's education. Others believe that it is more important to focus on academics during school time.
Discuss both these views, and give your opinion.
Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Physical education plays a vital role in development of kids while other says focusing on academics is very crucial in the early stages of life. In this paragraph i will shed some light on both the notions and give my opinion in upcoming segments.
Initially, physical education is very important for children to make them physically strong so that they will get injuries easily. It gives the proper strength and flexibility to the body. For example, children those participating in physical education during school are more active in sports and other activities than others. Moreover, physical education teach children how to become a good leader and teaches sportsmanship.
On the other hand, focussing on academics during initial school days, are significantly important to brainstorming of the students, because at the beginning students Learn and grasp very fast and achieve milestones in life. For example, there is a very motivated lines which almost everyone knows in life “better education makes better future.” Its not only about education during first school days children learn to know about how to become a good human being as well.
In my opinion, both plays very crucial parts to make a good human being. Although physical education make them physically and mentally strong, initial academic days make them a good person by teaching them ethics and morals.
In conclusion, although philosophy education gives physical strength and teaches them to become a good person but academics makes them more perfect and make them stronger to face different and difficult stages of life.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding physical education leading to fewer injuries is logically weak, and the point about academics is rather vague. The conclusion introduces a new idea about academics making students 'more perfect,' which is not well-supported by the preceding paragraphs. To reach a higher band, you should provide more specific, logical examples and ensure that your opinion is consistently supported throughout the essay rather than just stated in the final sections.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. You use some cohesive devices like 'Initially,' 'Moreover,' and 'On the other hand' to signal transitions. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the final paragraph where the transition between physical education and academics feels abrupt. The use of cohesive devices is adequate but lacks the flexibility required for a higher band. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between ideas would enhance the overall coherence.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it is somewhat repetitive and lacks precision. Phrases like 'make them physically strong' and 'good human being' are used multiple times, which limits the range. There are also some awkward collocations, such as 'brainstorming of the students' and 'motivated lines.' To improve, you should aim to use a wider range of vocabulary, including less common lexical items and more precise collocations. For example, instead of 'make them strong,' you could use 'enhance physical resilience' or 'foster holistic development.'
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'other says' (should be 'others say'), 'children those participating' (should be 'children who participate'), and 'both plays' (should be 'both play'). Additionally, there are issues with article usage and subject-verb agreement throughout the text. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and pluralization would significantly improve your score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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