Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-09-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that physical education classes are an important part of a child's education. Others believe that it is more important to focus on academics during school time.

Discuss both these views, and give your opinion.

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

in todays era , a much debated issue these days whether few people has a point that physical education classes are an important role for a below 12 students education on the other hand half of the era is believe that it is important to focus on academics during school time I go with former point because I believe that education about physicals are a good thing in a Childs education

On the first hand if children know about physical education . Child gain a sense of humour and he or she becomes more sincere . At this age children know about this . it is very beneficial for growing stage. furthermore school has to provide a certain lecture for physical education

On the second hand it is more important to have an eyes on academics along school time it is important for child grades as they know about grammars , Maths and so on .

According to my opinion teachers should give a certain class for students who are interested in learning this subject . This is not compulsory , Those student want to attend will attend the class as per class time . this may has to be a last lecture because if students wants to attend the class , they will attend it Otherwise they will go home .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt by discussing the importance of physical education and academic focus, and it clearly states the writer's opinion in the introduction ("I go with former point"). However, the ideas are under-developed and lack clear supporting examples, relying on vague statements such as "Child gain a sense of humour and he or she becomes more sincere." Furthermore, the length requirement has not been met: the response contains 222 words, which falls short of the 250-word minimum. This under-length limitation directly impacts the depth of task fulfilment, resulting in a Band 4.5 score for Task Achievement.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is divided into paragraphs, which attempts to structure the arguments logically. However, the progression of ideas is frequently disrupted by poor referencing, punctuation errors, and a lack of smooth transitions. Transitional phrases like "On the first hand" and "On the second hand" are used, but they are grammatically awkward. Paragraphing is also inconsistent, with some very brief paragraphs that fail to develop a cohesive train of thought. Overall, the organization is basic and mechanical, which limits the score to Band 5.0.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is very limited and repetitive. The writer frequently reuses basic words such as "education," "important," and "children." There are noticeable lexical errors and awkward collocations throughout the text, such as "physical education classes are an important role," "half of the era is believe," and "have an eyes on academics." These errors and the narrow range of vocabulary restrict the response to a Band 4.5, as the word choices are often inappropriate or strain comprehension.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The grammatical structure of the essay is heavily flawed. There is an absence of correct punctuation, leading to run-on sentences and fragments (e.g., "in todays era , a much debated issue these days whether few people has a point..."). Subject-verb agreement errors (e.g., "few people has," "half of the era is believe") and tense inconsistencies are pervasive. While the writer attempts some complex structures, they are almost always faulty. The high frequency of basic grammatical errors impedes readability, placing this in the Band 4.5 range.

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