Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Barron's Writing · 2026-10-15
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that physical education classes are an important part of a child's education. Others believe that it is more important to focus on academics during school time.
Discuss both these views, and give your opinion.
Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Nowadays, some indiviuals have argued that physical education classes are significant in a child's learning, while others are of the opinion that it is essential to concentrate on acedmics during school hours. This essay will discuss why both phyical education sessions and acedemucs are important in a childs learning. However I strongly believe that incoperating physical education activities is benefical and will keep the pupils healthy and alert during and after school hours.
To begin with, physical education classes in child's education plays a vital role in the pupil's education. This is because, these classes helps to keep the child's mind at alert which will enable him pay attention more to other educational activities. For instance, after activities such as football, students have been noted to be active in subsequent classes and eager to learn. This will help them excel well acedamically and get good grades. Also, The physical education classes encourages social interactions among students and also understand what it means to work as a team. This is because, the classes are equipped with activities that will encourage team participations. For examples games like tug-of-war involves team work. As a result of this, the students interact and make friends with each other, understand team work and also how to work under pressure.
On the other hand, focusing solely on acedemics during school team has its own importance. It brodens the childs horizon when it comes to acquring knwoledge. This is because, the pupil is made to pay attention in learning educational contents to enable him perform well in school. Take for instance, a child who is always reading educational books maintains good grades and develop a life long learning habits. This will build the childs mental capacity, intelligence and also make the scholars in future.
In conclusion, the issue of wether physical education classes are important in a child's education or to focus only on acedemics during school time has a strong argument on both sides. However from my stand point, I strongly believe that physical education classes plays a vital role in the learners life because it enables that relieve the stress from acedemic activities and also encourage social interactions.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
You address both sides of the question and state a clear preference for including physical education, particularly in the introduction and conclusion. Relevant support includes the claim that exercise can help pupils stay alert and the example of football, as well as teamwork in tug-of-war. The academic-focused paragraph also explains how study may build knowledge and support good grades. However, this side is less fully developed, and the essay does not explore how schools might balance academic and physical learning. Some claims, such as reading leading to becoming a scholar, need clearer explanation. To strengthen the response, develop the comparison more evenly and explain why your preferred approach benefits children overall, rather than mainly repeating that it supports health and social interaction.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion. Paragraphs generally stay focused, and signposts such as “To begin with” and “On the other hand” make the shift between positions easy to follow. This gives the essay a coherent progression. However, some linking is mechanical or repetitive: “This is because” appears several times, and “Also” and “As a result of this” sometimes connect ideas without making their relationship precise. In the final paragraph, the phrase “the issue of whether” leads into an unclear either-or summary. Use a wider range of natural transitions and clearer references, and make the conclusion synthesise the two arguments before restating your view.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “physical education,” “social interactions,” “team work,” “mental capacity,” and “life long learning habits.” These choices help communicate the main ideas, but the range is limited and several noticeable spelling and word-choice errors reduce precision, such as “indivuals,” “acedmics,” “broadens” written as “brodens,” and “acquring.” There are also awkward or inaccurate combinations, including “mind at alert,” “team participations,” and “make the scholars in future.” These do not prevent the reader from understanding the general argument, but they make parts less natural. Build accuracy by checking spelling and learning common collocations, especially for describing concentration, academic achievement, and teamwork.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including explanations with “because,” examples introduced by “For instance,” and a contrastive opening with “On the other hand.” Most ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors recur. For example, “physical education classes … plays” and “these classes helps” have subject–verb agreement problems; “in child's education” needs an article or plural form; and “enable him pay attention” is missing “to.” The conclusion’s “because it enables that relieve the stress” is also structurally unclear. Punctuation and capitalisation are inconsistent, as in “Also, The.” Review agreement, articles, and verb patterns, then proofread complex sentences to ensure each clause is complete and clearly connected.
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