Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that physical education classes are an important part of a child's education. Others believe that it is more important to focus on academics during school time.

Discuss both these views, and give your opinion.

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In the recent era of advancements, academic and physical education are both parallely significant. In my opinion, incuding the fitness into the curicullum will majorly outshine the fact of only focusing on theory .

To commence, bookish knowledge contributes towards brain deveopment and overall decision of what a child becomes upon growing up. Such studies not only assist students to recognize their interest of earning, but also helps them build a better life eventually. But, the given statement is also true that during school time , teachers should only deliver theoritical knowledge and after school the focus should shift to physical training.

In contrast, not all students are intelligent enough to keep interest in books. Inclusion of physical knowledge to education system will simultaneously provide input towards becoming a better personality. Each and every individual should be made aware of how crucial it is to stay fit while building future. For example, not eating healthy and continuously falling sick does not allow one to focus into anything. Also, several pupils are keen to achieve their careers in sports.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You give a relevant opinion in the opening, arguing that fitness should be included in the curriculum, and you mention benefits of academic study, health, and sports careers. However, the discussion of the academic-focused view is not fully explained: the claim that teachers should deliver only theoretical knowledge is stated, but its reasons are not developed. The physical-education argument is also brief, with the example about illness and concentration left general. The response does not meet the required minimum length, so there is limited space to explain both views and support your position. Develop each side with a clear reason and a specific example, then restate your judgement in a conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic paragraph structure: an introduction, a paragraph on academic learning, and a contrasting paragraph supporting physical education. Linking expressions such as “To commence,” “But,” and “In contrast” help signal the direction of the discussion. However, the progression is not fully clear because the second paragraph shifts from the value of academic study to the opposing claim without explaining the connection, and the final paragraph ends abruptly rather than concluding the argument. Some links are also mechanical, and “But” does not clearly show how the following claim relates to the preceding point. Organise the body into one paragraph for each view, use references that clearly connect ideas, and add a concluding paragraph.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “brain development,” “theoretical knowledge,” “physical training,” and “personality,” and the main ideas remain understandable. There are, however, noticeable spelling and word-choice problems that reduce precision, such as “parallely,” “incuding,” “curicullum,” and “deveopment.” Some phrases are also unnatural or unclear: “interest of earning” does not clearly express what students may be interested in, while “physical knowledge” is less precise than “physical education.” Aim for accurate, natural collocations rather than ornate wording. Proofread spelling and choose direct expressions such as “academic subjects,” “career interests,” and “physical fitness” to make your meaning clearer.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple statements and some longer structures, including “Such studies not only assist students to recognize their interest … but also helps them build a better life.” This shows an attempt to connect ideas, but the sentence has a subject–verb agreement problem: “studies” requires “help,” not “helps.” Other errors include “In my opinion, incuding the fitness,” where the article and sentence construction are faulty, and “does not allow one to focus into anything,” where the preposition pattern is incorrect. Punctuation spacing is inconsistent, and the final paragraph contains a fragment-like ending. Use a wider range of controlled sentence patterns, check agreement and articles, and read each sentence aloud to identify incomplete or awkward constructions.

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