Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that physical education classes are an important part of a child's education. Others believe that it is more important to focus on academics during school time.

Discuss both these views, and give your opinion.

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

One section of society think that, physical education is integral part of learing during school days. While, other think that, during school time, focusing on academics is more crutial. This essay will elucidate both of these views along with my opinion in the favour of later view.

On one side, physical education plays an important role in develpment of mind especially in children. During physical activities, the part of brain responsible for critical thinking gets activated which leads to overall development of mind as well as physical health. For exmple, nowadays kids are attracted to screens and mobile phones and prefer staying home rather than going out for any physical activities. Therefore, it is necessary for schools to focus on physical activities during school hours.

On the other side, focusing on academics are important during school hours, because schools are the place where students gets the environment in which they can focus on studies without any distractions. To illustrate, after reaching home, they are distracted by different gadgets such as mobile phones, television or tablets. It does not only distract them while studing but also disrupts the overall routine of a child. Thus, proper attention should be given to academics during school hours.

To recapitulate, Although it is important to focus on physical activities to maintain health of a child, I beleive that it is more important to focus on academics during school time which servers the main purpose of a school.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You discuss both views and state a clear preference for academics, so the response is relevant to the prompt. However, the support is limited: the physical-education paragraph mainly asserts that activity develops the mind and health, while the academic paragraph focuses on distractions at home. These points need fuller explanation and more specific examples to show why each view matters. The conclusion repeats your position rather than adding a developed final insight. The response contains 230 words, which is 20 words below the required minimum; 12 words copied from the task prompt were not counted. This shortfall contributes to the limited development. Extend both sides with concrete examples and explain your reasoning more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, one paragraph for each view, and a conclusion. Signposting such as “On one side,” “On the other side,” and “To recapitulate” helps readers follow the discussion. However, some linking is mechanical, and the contrast between the views could be made more explicit. The opening sentence of the second body paragraph, for example, repeats the claim about academics without clearly connecting it to the preceding argument for physical education. There is also a punctuation break in “Although it is important …, I believe,” where the capitalised “Although” interrupts the sentence. Use transitions that express the relationship between ideas and connect each example directly to the claim it supports.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “physical education,” “critical thinking,” “distractions,” and “overall routine.” There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “integral part” and “proper attention.” However, spelling errors are noticeable, including “learing,” “develpment,” “crutial,” “studing,” and “beleive,” and some word combinations are unnatural, such as “the later view” and “the part of brain responsible for critical thinking gets activated.” These choices reduce precision and make the language less fluent. Build accuracy by checking spelling carefully and learning natural collocations, for example, “the latter view” and “support children’s cognitive development.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a mixture of simple and complex sentences, including a reason clause with “because” and a concession in the conclusion. However, errors occur frequently enough to affect control. Examples include “One section of society think” and “other think,” where subject–verb agreement is incorrect, and “focusing on academics are important,” where the subject requires a singular verb. Articles and sentence construction also need attention: “physical education is integral part” needs an article, while “It does not only distract them … but also disrupts” has an unclear subject and an unbalanced construction. The final sentence begins “Although” with a capital letter after a comma. Practise checking agreement, articles, and parallel structures, then proofread punctuation in longer sentences.

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