Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-07-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many parts of the world, people rely on private cars for transportation.

In what ways does reliance on private cars affect the way we live?

Do the effects tend to be positive or negative?

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Throughout the world, people prefer to use private vehicles for commuting. It affects us in many ways, such as pollution, traffic and accidents. This issue has both advantages and disadvantages. This essay will discuss the main negative aspect before reaching the conclusion.

The primary reason is that a higher number of cars means more carbon is released. This is because pollution increases. Moreover, whenever a car runs, the engine produce a gas that are not good for breathing. For example, air quality in urban areas is 34% lower than in rural places where there is less transportation. Therefore, city people usually suffer from breathing problems like Asthma. To overcome this, more public transport should be launched, and everyone should be encouraged to use it for work.

Another important point to consider is that traffic will increase. The main reason is that everyone uses their own vehicle as a mode of transportation. Additionally, due to traffic, people will be in a rush, which leads to accidents. For instance, the quarterly ratio of collisions has increased by 45% over the last 5 years in India. Consequently, that has affected many families. Overall, it tends to be a negative trend. As it is directly or indirectly creating problems for the surroundings.

In conclusion, I believe that private cars for transportation affect the environment. This is a negative trend as environmental damage reflects on people's lives. Apart from this, traffic leads to a high risk of accidents. Overall, this essay has demonstrated why this view is most inappropriate.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, identifying both the effects of private car reliance and expressing a clear negative position. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you provide specific examples like air quality statistics and accident ratios, the explanation of these points is brief. To reach a higher band, ensure that each body paragraph fully explores the 'why' and 'how' behind your arguments rather than just stating the problem. The conclusion is a bit repetitive, as it restates points already made without adding a final synthesis of the argument.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use cohesive devices such as 'Moreover,' 'Therefore,' and 'Additionally' to link ideas. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. For instance, the final sentence of the second paragraph, 'As it is directly or indirectly creating problems for the surroundings,' is a sentence fragment that disrupts the flow. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring all sentences are complete will help improve the cohesion of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'commuting,' 'transportation,' and 'collisions.' There are some minor inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'the quarterly ratio of collisions,' which is slightly unnatural in this context. Additionally, the phrase 'most inappropriate' in the conclusion seems to be a misuse of vocabulary, as it does not accurately reflect your argument that the trend is negative. To improve, focus on using collocations more precisely and expanding your range of academic vocabulary to express complex ideas more naturally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text. For example, 'the engine produce a gas that are not good' contains subject-verb agreement errors ('produce' should be 'produces'; 'are' should be 'is'). There are also punctuation issues, such as the unnecessary comma after 'Additionally'. While these errors do not impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and proofreading for minor slips will significantly improve your accuracy.

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