Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-08-28
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many parts of the world, people rely on private cars for transportation.
In what ways does reliance on private cars affect the way we live?
Do the effects tend to be positive or negative?
Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In this rapidly changing world, it is undoubtedly true that individuals use their own transport for commuting from different parts of the globe. This could be a serious issue for the coming generation since humans are directly harming the environment by using their own vehicles, producing more pollution. This has totally unfavourable effects. This essay will further elaborate my reasons in the upcoming paragraphs, which leads a logical conclusion.
To commence with, there is adequate evidence of this view, which is sustainable. The top-notch concrete reason is that people are the ones who are destroying the whole world day by day by their own needs. for example, everyone has a personal car or motor bikes these days and they all the time prefer to use vehicle to use for work, travel and so on. However, there are many public buses and trains available to commute in city or outside that is less cheaper and it would be way better than having own personal car everywhere aslo they can save fuel and planet as well.
Moreover, relying on personal automobiles is extremely bad for citizens because they waste fuel to travel for one person, and public transportation can carry hundreds of folks at once. In addition, they should avoid this trend and need to start thinking about future generations. Along with this, private motor vehicles can producing a lot of pollution that makes air quality even worse day by day. For instance, right now air quality is poorer, and if look back during COVID time all the the transport services were shut down and that time sky were clear and there was fresh air to breathe.
To conclude, there are plenty strong factors that supporting that buses and other public commuting services are better than own a vehicle, populace can save their money and others life to also it is
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by discussing the reliance on private cars and identifying the effects as negative. However, the development is somewhat superficial. While you mention environmental concerns and the benefits of public transport, the ideas lack depth and specific, well-explained examples. The conclusion is incomplete, which prevents a full summary of your position. To improve, ensure that each paragraph fully explores the 'why' and 'how' behind your arguments, and always complete your concluding thoughts to provide a sense of closure to the essay.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the progression of ideas is occasionally disjointed. You use some cohesive devices like 'To commence with' and 'Moreover', but these are sometimes used mechanically or incorrectly. Referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the phrase 'there is adequate evidence of this view, which is sustainable', where the connection to the previous sentence is weak. The final paragraph is unfinished, which disrupts the overall coherence of the piece. Focus on using linking words more naturally and ensuring each paragraph has a clear, completed logical flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You rely on some informal or repetitive phrasing, such as 'top-notch concrete reason' and 'hundreds of folks'. There are also some collocation errors, such as 'less cheaper' (which is grammatically redundant) and 'supporting that buses... are better than own a vehicle'. To improve, aim to use more academic collocations and avoid informal language. Expanding your vocabulary to include more precise terms related to environmental impact and urban planning would be beneficial.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that occasionally impede readability. For example, 'private motor vehicles can producing' should be 'can produce', and 'if look back during COVID time' is missing a subject. There are also issues with article usage and sentence fragments, particularly in the final paragraph. While your meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors suggests a need for more careful proofreading and a focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and complex sentence construction.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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