Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many parts of the world, people rely on private cars for transportation.

In what ways does reliance on private cars affect the way we live?

Do the effects tend to be positive or negative?

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In modern era,there are many people treval all round the world include busniess matter and some for just trevalling to see to things.some people are used private and other treval throught public transportation. i will discuss positive and negative effect in upon coming the parapragh.

To begin with, many people thank that privacy is important that by they used private cars,buses,plans.Furthermore, some busniess man and rich man are also private vehicles because they have enough money to spent for their treval.

Public transportation is also used wide range in the world.it is used in big cities like vancouver,tronoto,london.for example i was doing job as manager in big company that was located downtown in Tronoto.It is crowed area that why i preffered local buses or trains.Moreover, it is less expensive ,more comportable.

To conclude, it is depand on person choice and prefferance

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response makes a limited attempt to discuss transport choices, but it does not adequately answer either part of the question: it gives little explanation of how reliance on private cars affects daily life and does not clearly decide whether the effects are mainly positive or negative. The opening promises to discuss “positive and negative effect,” yet the body mostly describes private and public transport, including a personal example about choosing buses in downtown Toronto. The conclusion, “it is depend on person choice,” does not state an overall judgement. The response is also 109 words below the required minimum, leaving too little space to develop relevant reasons and examples. To improve, state a clear position and explain specific effects, such as convenience, congestion, costs, or pollution, with supporting examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the response with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Phrases such as “To begin with,” “Furthermore,” and “To conclude” signal stages, and the Toronto example gives one paragraph a recognisable focus. However, progression is limited: the discussion shifts from private cars to public transport without clearly connecting these points to the effects of car reliance. The opening says both positive and negative effects will be discussed, but the paragraphs do not develop that structure, and the final sentence does not summarise the argument. Some linking is mechanical, while punctuation and spacing make boundaries between ideas harder to follow. Use one paragraph for each main effect and connect each example explicitly to the question.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses a small range of topic-related vocabulary, including “private cars,” “public transportation,” “downtown,” and “less expensive.” These terms make the general subject understandable, and “crowded area” helps describe the writer’s example. However, vocabulary is often repetitive or imprecise, and frequent spelling errors—such as “treval,” “busniess,” “preffered,” and “comportable”—make the writing less clear and weaken the reader’s confidence. Some expressions are also unnatural, for example “used wide range in the world” and “coming the parapragh.” Build a more accurate set of transport and impact vocabulary, and check spelling carefully. More precise phrases such as “rely on private vehicles,” “traffic congestion,” and “travel costs” would help express relevant ideas.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The writing mainly uses short, simple statements, with a few attempts to join ideas using “because,” “that,” and “Moreover.” This gives some basic sentence variety, but control is inconsistent. For example, “i will discuss positive and negative effect” has problems with capitalisation, article use, and singular/plural agreement, while “it is depand on person choice” is not formed correctly. In “some people are used private,” the verb pattern is faulty, and several sentences run together without appropriate punctuation. These errors sometimes make relationships between ideas difficult to understand. Practise accurate simple sentence patterns first, then add controlled complex sentences—for example, explaining why people choose cars and what consequences follow.

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