Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-07-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Using a cell phone while driving is dangerous because it causes the driver to become distracted. Therefore, cell phone use by drivers should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

It is true that drivers are distracted to use mobile phone when they drive a car so it is necessary for them to avoid use mobile phone during driving. I totally agree with this opinion.

To begin with, there are several reasons to avoid mobile phone when they drive a vehicle. First and the foremost, government need to make strict driving rule. To explain, if people use mobile phone while driving, they should take action on them by imposing huge amount of money as the form of tax so they feel reluctant to use cell phone during driving as a result, it helps to minimize the problems. For instance, according to the Ajeet newspaper, 2000 accidents were occurred when these role were not implemented but after these rule, it is quickly decrease which is more helpful for people lives.

However, despite not following this rule, people can suffer from fatal issues due to certain reasons. When these rule would not permitted, it can increase the number of accidents on the roads in turn of which people can loose their life. In addition to it, while using mobile phone on roads, it can increase the traffic on roads that is why people can waste their time that is why they would neither reach late on work nor concentrate on it as a result, it can minimize the performance of work. Thus, high authorities should make illegal while driving vehicle.

To conclude, although using mobile phone while driving due to emergency, i believe that individual ought to avoid cell phone when they drive due to safety for them.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

You have clearly stated your position in the introduction and maintained it throughout the essay. You addressed the prompt by providing reasons for why cell phone use should be illegal. However, the development of your ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding traffic congestion and work performance is slightly tangential and not fully linked to the core issue of safety. To improve, ensure that every supporting point directly reinforces your main argument. While you provided an example, it was somewhat vague; using more specific, real-world examples would strengthen your response. Overall, you have addressed all parts of the task, but the depth of your arguments could be further extended.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

Your essay follows a logical structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use some cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'First and the foremost', and 'In addition to it'. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly inaccurate, such as 'in turn of which' and 'that is why' used repeatedly in the same sentence. Paragraphing is present, but the transition between ideas within paragraphs could be smoother. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that your referencing (e.g., 'these rule') is precise and grammatically correct.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You have an adequate range of vocabulary to communicate your ideas, such as 'distracted', 'imposing', 'reluctant', and 'fatal issues'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'take action on them by imposing huge amount of money' and 'these role were not implemented'. Some phrasing is also repetitive, such as the frequent use of 'mobile phone' and 'driving'. To improve, try to incorporate more precise synonyms and collocations related to the topic, and pay closer attention to word forms to ensure they fit naturally into your sentences.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'government need to make'), article usage (e.g., 'on the roads'), and incorrect verb forms (e.g., '2000 accidents were occurred'). Additionally, some sentences are structurally confusing, such as 'When these rule would not permitted'. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur frequently enough to impact the overall clarity of your writing. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement will help you improve your score significantly.

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