Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-08-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Using a cell phone while driving is dangerous because it causes the driver to become distracted. Therefore, cell phone use by drivers should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In this unprecedented era, it is an irrefutable fact that driving has become a subject of intense debate. Therefore, it is increasingly argued that using a mobile phone while driving could be significantly harmful as it is considered a major distraction and it should be prohibited. This essay will analyze my viewpoint using relevant examples in the ensuing paragraphs.

To commence with, discussing the reasons why a cell phone causes detrimental effects on drivers. The first and foremost reason is the increased rate of accidents. It is often believed that people should follow the stricter traffic rules in order to minimize mishappening on the roads. What is even more, the rules are imposed to ensure traffic management, safe driving and promote safety for drivers as well as pedestrians. Hence, while people are driving they should concentrate on signages and road legislations rather than using a mobile devices or other activities. This typically distracts a person's attention from driving and causes road traffic accidents. To illustrate, one study conducted in Japan by 'RTA Management Team' has shown that prohibiting the usage of electronic gadgets during driving generously reduced about 60% of accidents compare to the past two decades.

Furthermore, a cell phone usage during driving could lead to physical injuries, as if a person uses the mobile in car could be an excessive use. Eventually it would contribute to eye strain, screen fatigue and general body weakness. It is undeniable that an individual has to be very fit while they drive. Even in many countries, a driving license can only be issued after certain medical tests and physician's approval. This encourages safe driving in the nation. This is the reason that people should adapt a devices free driving technique.

In essence, it is ubiquitous to see that cell phones use by chauffeurs is banned and illegal to foster safe driving, reduce road accidents and prevent physical and metal injuries. I strongly believe with this laid notion to ensure sustainable result.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. The arguments regarding accident reduction and physical health are relevant, though the second paragraph regarding 'physical injuries' and 'eye strain' is somewhat tangential to the core issue of distraction. While the ideas are supported, the development is occasionally repetitive. For instance, the mention of 'safe driving' appears in almost every paragraph. To reach a higher band, you should focus on deepening the analysis of the distraction aspect rather than listing general health concerns. The conclusion clearly restates your stance, ensuring the task requirements are met.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas. You use a variety of cohesive devices such as 'To commence with', 'Furthermore', and 'In essence', which helps the flow. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical or forced. For example, the phrase 'What is even more' is non-standard. Additionally, the referencing in the second paragraph is a bit clunky. Improving the variety and naturalness of your linking words would enhance the overall cohesion of the essay.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, including terms like 'irrefutable', 'detrimental', 'ubiquitous', and 'sustainable'. However, there are some instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'generously reduced' (should be 'significantly' or 'substantially') and 'people should adapt a devices free driving technique' (should be 'adopt a device-free'). There is also a minor error with 'metal injuries' instead of 'mental'. While you attempt to use less common vocabulary, the precision is not always consistent, which limits the score to a 6.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you successfully use some complex forms, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. Examples include 'discussing the reasons why a cell phone causes...' (which is a fragment, not a full sentence), 'compare to the past' (should be 'compared to'), and 'cell phones use by chauffeurs' (should be 'cell phone use'). Punctuation is generally acceptable, but the frequency of these minor grammatical slips prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and article usage would be beneficial.

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