Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Barron's Writing · 2026-08-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Using a cell phone while driving is dangerous because it causes the driver to become distracted. Therefore, cell phone use by drivers should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

There is an argument that it should not be legal to use mobile phones when driving on roads as it results in distraction, and cause incidents. I somewhat agrees with the statement and I would give the reasons in the following paragraph.

To begin with, Using any technological gadgets while driving is dangerous for us. It is crucial to acknowledge the safety of us and our loved ones. According to a study conducted around 2012 at the oxford university, almost 65% people looses their life on road because they distract themselves by phones every year. It is our responsibility to keep in mind the safety of us and everyone else who is driving on the same road. Using cell phones not only distract the individual from driving but also causes major accidents which results in fatal injuries or even death. Furthermore, some people are very busy with their day to day life, and they use phones in order to save time. It also depends on the situation. for instance, some people used mobile phones in case of an emergency, while others like to use it when feeling bored. People who use it for the purpose of an entertainment, should use hands-free devices for example, if they need to hear or change the music they should use the ear phones or even in some new cars we can touch the screen on the display which helps in some cases.

In conclusion, It is true that it should not be neglected how people are irresponsible while driving. However, I think it should not made it illegal. Instead the government should apply more strict regulations and increase the penalty.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by taking a position, though the development is somewhat inconsistent. You acknowledge the dangers of mobile phone use but argue against a total ban, suggesting stricter regulations instead. This is a valid approach. However, the supporting arguments are slightly underdeveloped. For example, the mention of 'emergency' situations is a good point, but the transition to 'entertainment' and 'hands-free devices' feels a bit disjointed. To improve, ensure each paragraph focuses on one clear, well-supported argument that directly reinforces your stance. The conclusion effectively summarizes your position, but the overall argument could be more persuasive with more specific examples or logical depth regarding why a ban is ineffective compared to stricter penalties.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your argument. You use some cohesive devices like 'To begin with,' 'Furthermore,' and 'In conclusion' to signal transitions. However, the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical, and some referencing is slightly unclear. For instance, the sentence 'It also depends on the situation' lacks a strong link to the previous point about busy lifestyles. Additionally, the internal structure of the second paragraph is a bit cluttered, jumping between safety, emergency use, and entertainment. Improving the use of cohesive devices to create smoother transitions between ideas would enhance the logical progression of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'technological gadgets,' 'fatal injuries,' and 'stricter regulations.' However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'looses their life' (should be 'lose') and 'it should not made it illegal' (grammatically incorrect phrasing). You attempt to use some less common vocabulary, but these errors occasionally distract the reader. To reach a higher band, focus on using collocations more accurately and refining your word choice to be more precise. For example, instead of 'causes major accidents,' you could use 'leads to severe traffic collisions.'

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'I somewhat agrees' (subject-verb agreement), 'almost 65% people looses' (article/pluralization error), and 'it should not made it illegal' (passive voice construction error). These errors are noticeable throughout the text. To improve, pay closer attention to subject-verb agreement, verb tense consistency, and the correct formation of passive voice structures. Focusing on proofreading for these common grammatical slips will help you achieve a higher level of accuracy.

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