Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Barron's Writing · 2026-08-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Using a cell phone while driving is dangerous because it causes the driver to become distracted. Therefore, cell phone use by drivers should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In recent years, it has been proposed that the use of cell phones by the motorists should be legally prohibited due to the distraction it caused which in turn leads to catastrophic. I firmly agree with this view, as I believe that, placing ban on the use of mobile gadgets would enable an accident-free journey and as well as reducing the high rate of emergency in the hospital.

In this contemporary world, mobile phone has become part of our daily life. It enhances connectivity for easy transaction of businesses and communication from our loved ones. I believe the government should place a ban on the use of cell phones when operating a vehicle in to curb misfortunes on the road. Because the motorists are more distracted when glancing through their phone screen which in turn can lead severe catastrophic for the driver and other road users.

Furthermore, the purpose of the government is to preserve the lives of its citizens. And in order to reduce the rate of emergency in our hospitals to cater for the sick of our mother's care, the authority should enable the effectiveness of the road traffic force. In develop countries, for instance, there are laws guiding the road which affect everyone. If anyone fails to abide by it will surely face the consequences. when this policy is put in place it help our doctors to focus on the people with health challenge.

In conclusion, the use of mobile phone by the drivers should be legally ban in order to prevent daily accident on the road which wiould in turn reduce the increase rate in emergency which will help our doctorrs to focus more on the sic

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. The main ideas—safety and reducing the burden on healthcare systems—are relevant. However, the development is somewhat repetitive, particularly in the second and third paragraphs, where the focus on 'emergency' and 'hospitals' is mentioned multiple times without adding significant new depth. To reach a higher band, you should aim to expand on the practical implications of a ban, such as the role of technology (hands-free devices) or the enforcement challenges, rather than repeating the same points about hospital pressure. The conclusion is also incomplete, cutting off mid-sentence, which affects the overall task completion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Furthermore', 'In conclusion', and 'For instance'. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical, and there are instances where the flow is disrupted by awkward phrasing or incomplete sentences. Referencing is generally clear, but the lack of a finished conclusion significantly impacts the coherence of the final paragraph. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear, singular focus would enhance the overall structure.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You have an adequate range of vocabulary to convey your meaning, such as 'catastrophic', 'contemporary', and 'prohibited'. However, there are several instances of inaccurate word choice and collocation, such as 'leads to catastrophic' (should be 'catastrophic consequences') and 'cater for the sick of our mother's care' (which is unclear and unnatural). Spelling errors like 'wiould', 'doctorrs', and 'sic' also occur. To improve, focus on using collocations correctly and proofreading for basic spelling errors. Expanding your vocabulary to include more precise academic terms would also help elevate your score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, they often contain grammatical errors, such as 'placing ban on the use of mobile gadgets' (missing article) and 'the use of mobile phone by the drivers should be legally ban' (incorrect verb form). There are also issues with subject-verb agreement and punctuation. The final sentence is incomplete, which is a significant error. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically article usage and verb tense consistency, before attempting more complex structures.

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