Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-09-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Using a cell phone while driving is dangerous because it causes the driver to become distracted. Therefore, cell phone use by drivers should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In recent days, using a cell phone while driving has become a significant issue in many parts of the world. This situation can be attributed to several factors and has resulted in a number serious consequences. I strongly believe that cell phone se by drivers should be made illegal. This essay will explain the main reasons for my position and provide relevant examples.

The primary reason why I support this view is that, cell phones cause distraction to drivers. In other words, if they are used while driving. For example, if they use a cell phone in most traffic areas or while driving fast, it will be dangerous if they meet any accidents. Consequently creates a life threat.

Another compelling reason is that it creates a disturbance to other drivers who are not driving in a proper way by distracting from a cellphone. This can lead to traffic congestion, which is particularly important for the public and pedestrains. For example, if they cause any traffic, then all other vehicles will move slowly and it will create a delay in travelling for public.

In conclusion, I firmly agree that the government should take this problem seriously and that cellphone usage while driving should be made illegal. This is primarily for individuals' safety and public protection.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you clearly state your position in the introduction, the supporting arguments are underdeveloped and repetitive. For instance, the second paragraph mentions 'distraction' but lacks specific, well-explained examples to support the claim. The third paragraph attempts to discuss traffic congestion but remains vague. To improve, you must expand on your points with more detailed explanations and concrete examples to reach the required length and demonstrate a more thorough exploration of the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and occasionally inaccurate. For example, the phrase 'In other words, if they are used while driving' is a sentence fragment that disrupts the flow. Additionally, the transition between ideas is sometimes abrupt. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each sentence is complete and logically connected to the previous one to create a smoother progression of ideas throughout the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You rely on basic terms like 'significant issue' and 'dangerous'. There are also some minor errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'pedestrains' instead of 'pedestrians' and 'cellphone se' instead of 'cellphone use'. To achieve a higher score, try to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to the topic, such as 'mitigate', 'hazardous', or 'stringent regulations', and ensure you proofread carefully to avoid simple spelling mistakes.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. For example, the sentence 'Consequently creates a life threat' lacks a subject, and 'distracting from a cellphone' is an awkward construction. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. To improve, focus on ensuring every sentence has a clear subject and verb, and practice using complex structures like relative clauses or conditional sentences more accurately. Reducing these basic errors will significantly improve the overall quality of your writing.

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