Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Using a cell phone while driving is dangerous because it causes the driver to become distracted. Therefore, cell phone use by drivers should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Cell phones have undoubtedly become a necessity in our daily lives. Where every important thing, be it documents, contacts, digital cards and workspace is now within the same cell phone that once meant to be for calls only. Therefore, the usage of the cell phones have astonishingly increased.

How convenient it's now to pick-up the cell phone and call the person you intend to call without even the need to remember the contact number.

Imagine you're driving on a highway with a beautiful sunset in front of your eyes. You instantly get the urge to capture this moment before it's gone, right? You look for your cell phone to capture it and volia, you've it! That's how easy now the life is with the cell phone.

Now imagine the same scenario and while reaching for your cell phone you missed that there was a car at the front and without having time to react, you hit the car. You're left with nothing but regrets. The scenario could have been fatal, could cause unbearable damage to the car.

Therefore, in the developed countries, where the rules are strict and are made to protect people, the usage of the cell phones while driving is illegal. That makes pefect sense, because it's always better to be cautious than sorry later. I personally faced a similar situation in my life while driving to the office in my car. I was hit by another car frm behind while he was "just messaging his wife" while driving. Luckiluy the damage wasn't big and got the insurance coverage, but the risk is huge. Since then I follow "no cell phone" usage policy while driving whether the law says or not.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you support making phone use while driving illegal, and the personal example of being hit by a driver who was messaging gives the argument relevant, concrete support. You also explain a plausible danger through the imagined highway scenario. However, some ideas are developed less fully than others. The opening discussion of phones as everyday necessities and the sunset example take up space without clearly explaining why a legal ban is the best response. The claim that rules are strict in developed countries is also broad and unsupported. To strengthen the response, explain more directly how a ban could reduce distraction and whether it should cover all phone use or only activities such as messaging and photography.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable sequence: it introduces the importance of phones, illustrates distraction, then gives a personal accident example and states a policy position. Paragraph breaks help separate these stages. However, the progression is not consistently focused on the question: the first two paragraphs dwell on general phone convenience before the argument about legality emerges. The repeated “Imagine” and “Now imagine” structure is understandable but somewhat mechanical, and the final paragraph combines a general claim about developed countries, a personal anecdote, and a concluding principle. Use a more direct introduction that states your position, organise each body paragraph around one reason, and use clearer links to show how each example supports the case for a legal restriction.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “distracted,” “fatal,” “damage,” “insurance coverage,” and “risk,” and the personal account makes the meaning clear. There are also attempts at more expressive language, such as “unbearable damage” and “better to be cautious than sorry,” though some combinations are not natural or precise. Spelling errors such as “volia,” “pefect,” “frm,” and “Luckiluy” are noticeable, while phrases such as “usage of the cell phones” and “the same cell phone that once meant to be for calls only” are awkward. Aim for accurate, natural collocations and a more formal register; for example, describe the phone as “primarily used for calls” and refer to “phone use while driving” rather than repeatedly using “usage.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex forms, including conditional scenarios (“while reaching for your cell phone…”) and a relative clause (“where the rules are strict…”). The main ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors recur. “Where every important thing… is now within…” is a sentence fragment, and “the usage of the cell phones have” has subject–verb disagreement. Other examples include “How convenient it's now to pick-up…” and “could cause unbearable damage,” where the sentence structure or verb pattern is not well controlled. There are also inconsistent contractions and punctuation choices. Build complete sentences, check agreement between subjects and verbs, and revise complex sentences to ensure each clause has a clear subject and a correctly formed verb.

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