Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Using a cell phone while driving is dangerous because it causes the driver to become distracted. Therefore, cell phone use by drivers should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

introduction - given question is about using a cell phones while driving

context-

it is completely true that using a cell phone while driving is completely unsafe and can distract driver so i completely agree with a statement that using a cellphone by driver should be illegal because there are many chances of accident and can leads ro dead so ,it should be made illegal and according to my experience in my city while travelling somewhere i have seen people (drivers ) using a cell phone and it was not just for 1 time I have seen it for 3-4times and few days before while scrolling Instagram i have seen a post ,the post was about a accident of 2 members on a bike,the driver was using a phone and back guy was sleeping and the truck was coming front ,driver didn't saw truck,truck driver horned many times buy ,this driver guy was distracted and as we all know wt happened ,they had an accident and they were in hospital for 5_4 weeks the driver got recovered but the back guy causes dead because he came under the truck and truck was driven on him ,he causeddead very badly

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

Your position is clear: you completely agree that drivers’ cell-phone use should be illegal, and you give a relevant reason—distraction can lead to serious accidents. The account of the motorcycle collision also provides a specific example and shows the possible consequences. However, the response addresses the task only partially because the example takes up nearly all the discussion, while the reasons for making phone use illegal are not developed beyond the risk of accidents. The introduction labels (“introduction” and “context”) also do not form a developed essay. The response is 51 words below the required minimum, which limits the space available to explain your reasoning. Add another developed reason, such as the danger to pedestrians, and explain why a legal ban would help.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a recognisable overall direction: you state your agreement and then give an example intended to support it. However, ideas are not arranged into clear paragraphs, and labels such as “introduction” and “context” interrupt rather than guide the reader. The long account of the accident is presented as one extended sentence, making the sequence of events difficult to follow. Linking words such as “because” and “so” are used, but connections are often repetitive or unclear, as in “so, it should be made illegal and according to my experience.” Organise the response into an introduction, separate body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Use shorter sentences and clear sequencing phrases to show how each reason supports your position.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “distracted,” “accident,” “driver,” and “illegal,” and the reader can understand your central concern. However, the range is limited and several word choices or forms make parts of the account difficult to interpret. For example, “can leads ro dead” and “he causeddead very badly” do not express the intended consequences clearly; “causes dead” is also an unnatural phrase. Repetition of “driver,” “truck,” and “accident” further restricts the vocabulary. Build a more precise set of expressions for road safety and consequences, such as “cause a fatal collision” or “suffer serious injuries,” and check spelling and word forms before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response communicates a basic opinion and attempts to connect ideas with clauses using “because” and “and,” but sentence structures are mostly simple or become excessively long. Frequent errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries make the account hard to follow. Examples include “using a cell phone … can leads,” “driver didn't saw,” and “the back guy causes dead”; these need forms such as “can lead,” “didn’t see,” and a correctly structured description of the passenger’s death. Missing or inconsistent punctuation also obscures the sequence in the accident example. Practise writing one main idea per sentence, then check subject–verb agreement, past-tense forms, and articles. A few accurate complex sentences would add range without sacrificing clarity.

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