Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Using a cell phone while driving is dangerous because it causes the driver to become distracted. Therefore, cell phone use by drivers should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

in this 21st century, mobile phones are become a major part of our life even masses scroll around the clock to get connected with pople however when it cames the point using cellphone while driving this can lead to major consequences. I believe this should be illegal which will be explained in forthcoming paragraphs.

To commence with first major drawback is this can lead to road accidents.To explain it more, when driver use mobile phone for sending messages,reading texts or using social websites for entertainment there mind can be distracted and they are more likely to happen major accidents.For example, in America 2009 the survey was conducted by BBC, which depicts that more than 80 percent road accidents are being happened just cause of using mobile while driving. Therefore, this should be banned

Furthermore, using phone by driver can leads to time wastage . In other words, when individual use cell phone on major highways such as 410 in ontario they missed the major exit, which result them for a long journeys.For epitome, the newspaper in india the truibutes published that 80 proportion of employees are late due to not taking the right exit cause they are busy in their mobile phones.Moreover, the solution for this to use hand free if they have to attend very crucial call and they can also use CarPlay for navigation

To conclude, major road accidents and time waste are the major resons for make this illegal

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear: you agree that phone use while driving should be illegal, and the discussion of accidents is relevant to the question. However, the response addresses the task only partially because the reasons are not developed enough. The accident paragraph explains distraction, but the statistic is presented without context or explanation of how it supports a legal ban. The second point, about missing exits and wasting time, is less persuasive as a reason for illegality, and the suggestion to use hands-free devices or CarPlay introduces an alternative without clarifying whether these should be permitted. The required minimum length is not met: the response is 8 words short. Develop the strongest reasons with clearer explanation and relevant examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs signalled by “To commence with” and “Furthermore,” and a conclusion. This helps the reader follow the main points. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear, and some linking phrases feel mechanical. For example, “To explain it more” and “For epitome” do not connect the evidence naturally to the claim, while the final sentence of the second body paragraph shifts abruptly from missed exits to hands-free calls and CarPlay. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, as in “which result them for a long journeys.” Use simpler, accurate transitions and make each paragraph develop one central reason in a clear sequence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt topic-related vocabulary such as “distracted,” “road accidents,” “major highways,” and “navigation,” which makes the subject clear. There is also some effort to vary expression, but the range is limited and noticeable word-choice, collocation, and spelling errors sometimes make the reader work to understand the point. Examples include “masses scroll around the clock,” “major consequences,” “for epitome,” and “80 proportion of employees.” Several spellings are inaccurate, including “pople,” “cames,” and “resons.” Aim for precise, natural phrases rather than unusual expressions used incorrectly. Proofreading spelling and choosing standard collocations will make your ideas clearer and more convincing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including a conditional idea in “when driver use mobile phone… their mind can be distracted.” However, the range is limited, and complex sentences are often faulty; errors occur frequently enough to make some meanings difficult to follow. Examples include “mobile phones are become,” “when it cames the point using cellphone,” “using phone by driver can leads,” and “which result them for a long journeys.” These show problems with verb forms, subject–verb agreement, articles, and sentence construction. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly where sentences run together. Practise building accurate sentences with one main clause and a correctly formed subordinate clause, then check agreement and verb forms.

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