Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Using a cell phone while driving is dangerous because it causes the driver to become distracted. Therefore, cell phone use by drivers should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowsdays, cell phone has important role in our life, mostly every time we need carry cell phone with our but using cell phone while driving is dangerous because it causes the driver to become distracted. I am strongly agreed with this and that reason using mobile by frivers while driving should be made illegal.

In the upcoming paragraph, I shall discuss why mobile phone should made be illgeal while driving.

The major reason why I am thinking that cell phone use by drivers should be made illegal is loosing focusing on driving and distracted. I saw lots of cases where people using mobile phone by driving and that time they are checking notifications and sending message to someone and suddenlly some animals and kids came in front by the car and normal driving converted into accident. Secondly, when cell phone using while driving one hand occuiped to use cell phone and it is dangeous to drive car only one hand, and it can be convert into accident.

Government needs to strict laws to cell phone use by drivers shuold be made illegal for people safety. Heavy fine should be take from driving if they using cell phone while driving. Moreover, these laws help to driver ti driving safely and fully attentative.

In conclusion, it can be said that the strict laws is neccessary to stop mobile phone while driving because using smartphones while driving it dangours and because it causes the driver to become distracted, and cell phone use by drivers should be made illegal.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear: you strongly agree that drivers’ cell-phone use should be illegal, and you give relevant reasons, including distraction, accidents involving children or animals, and the danger of steering with one hand. However, the response addresses the task only partially because these ideas are brief and not fully explained; for example, the accident scenario is asserted but not developed with a specific example or explanation of how a ban would reduce the risk. The proposal of fines is relevant but also needs more detail. The response contains 215 words, so it is 35 words below the required minimum; 40 words copied from the prompt were not counted. Develop your reasons and support them with a concrete example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, a paragraph giving reasons, a paragraph about government action, and a conclusion. Sequencing words such as “The major reason,” “Secondly,” “Moreover,” and “In conclusion” help signal the stages of the argument. However, progression is limited because the ideas within paragraphs are not clearly separated or fully connected. The opening paragraph repeats the prompt and announces what the next paragraph will discuss, while the conclusion largely repeats the same claim. Some links are awkward or unclear, such as “Moreover, these laws help to driver ti driving safely.” Organise each paragraph around one developed point, use clearer references, and avoid repeating the same position without adding a final implication.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “notifications,” “sending message,” “heavy fine,” and “distracted,” so the reader can follow the general argument. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation, and spelling problems make parts difficult to understand. Examples include “loosing focusing,” “one hand occuiped,” “fully attentative,” and “dangours.” “Cell phone” and “mobile phone” are repeated frequently, and some phrases are not natural, such as “strict laws to cell phone use.” Aim for accurate, natural combinations such as “lose concentration,” “use a phone while driving,” and “impose a fine.” Proofreading spelling and choosing precise topic vocabulary would make your meaning clearer.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences with reasons, for example, “The major reason why I am thinking…” and the sentence describing children or animals appearing in front of a car. However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently in sentence structure, verb forms, articles, and agreement, sometimes making the meaning hard to follow. Examples include “I am strongly agreed,” “cell phone should made be illegal,” and “when cell phone using while driving.” The long accident sentence also joins several events without clear grammatical control. Practise forming complete clauses with a subject and correctly conjugated verb, and check articles and singular/plural agreement. Shorter, accurate sentences would help before attempting more complex structures.

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