Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Barron's Writing · 2026-11-04
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Using a cell phone while driving is dangerous because it causes the driver to become distracted. Therefore, cell phone use by drivers should be made illegal.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Cell phone use while operating motor vehicles causes distractions and thefore should be banned. I strongly agree drivers should not use cellphones while driving because they will not see or hear anything else.
To begin with, drivers need to concentrate and avoid distractions while driving. When using a cell phone, one can not see what is on the road thus causing accidents. Sense of sight is requied for navigation especially while driving. For example, if astudent is crossing a busy road during rush hours, the driver can avoid accident if he can see the student. Thus if he is on a phone call, he will not see the student thus causing accident.
Secondly, any machine operators need to bee keen on sounds produced by the machine and surrounding enviroment. Many atimes drivers warn each other by use of loud horn. If you are on a call, you will note hear when you are being warned by other drivers or even pedestrians thus causing accidents. For instance, when a driver is reversing and there is a black spot, pedestrians may shout prompting him to stop. This would not be possiable if he is on the phone.
In conclusion, cell phone utilisation while driving causes distraction and should be made illegal.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
Your position is clear from the opening: you strongly agree that drivers should not use phones, and both body paragraphs give relevant reasons. The examples of a student crossing a busy road and pedestrians warning a reversing driver help illustrate visual and auditory distraction. However, the second reason is less fully explained, and the response does not explore the proposal to make phone use illegal beyond repeating that it should be banned. The conclusion is also brief, and the required minimum length has not been met: the response is 41 words short. Develop the consequences or enforcement of a ban and extend your examples with explanation to address the task more fully.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two reason-based body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “To begin with,” “Secondly,” and “In conclusion” make the progression easy to follow, and examples are placed alongside the relevant points. This coherent arrangement is a strength. However, cohesion is somewhat mechanical because the paragraphs rely heavily on these basic transitions and repeatedly use “thus causing accidents.” Some references, such as “he” in the crossing example, are not fully precise because the driver’s identity is general. To improve, vary linking methods and make connections between claims and examples more explicit, while avoiding repeated wording.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “distractions,” “navigation,” “busy road,” “loud horn,” and “pedestrians.” These terms make the examples understandable. However, the range is limited and several choices or spelling errors reduce precision: “cell phone utilisation” is awkward in this context, “black spot” is unclear, and “machine operators” is not a natural way to refer to drivers here. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “thefore,” “requied,” “enviroment,” and “possiable.” Build a more accurate range of collocations for road safety and distraction, and proofread spelling so that the reader can focus on your argument.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You use a mix of simple sentences and some complex structures, including “When using a cell phone, one cannot see what is on the road” and the conditional example beginning “if a student is crossing.” Most of the meaning remains clear, and the paragraph structure supports understanding. Some grammatical errors persist, however. For example, “one can not see … thus causing accidents” has an unclear connection between the clauses, while “if he is on a phone call, he will not see the student thus causing accident” needs clearer clause punctuation and a plural or determiner before “accident.” The response also relies on similar sentence patterns. Practise combining clauses accurately and check articles, agreement, and punctuation in longer sentences.
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