Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-11-13
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The given line graph represent the information of members which participate centre in Melbourune, Australia for the period of 2000 to 2020.The film culb have highest participants in 2000 to 2020.Film club have main feathure was that most of members were interested in it.The lowest participants were in musical performence becase in 2000 there was no one participated in it. But in 2005 some person started to show interested in music.In Table tennis 15 peson were innterested in it and 50 plus in 2020. The other one was Amateur dramatics more than 20 person were participated in 2000 and less than 10 were in 2020.That's one was there members lost interested.The Martial arts was average members 50 were participated in 2000 to 2020.Some person show interested in them and some lost. The members are equal in every session in every years but in other activities. More members are interested in Film term.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
You identify several relevant overall features: the film club remains the most popular activity, table tennis rises substantially, and amateur dramatics declines. Some figures are also broadly accurate, such as table tennis reaching “50 plus” and amateur dramatics falling to fewer than ten. However, the response only partially reports the graph: the claim that martial arts averaged 50 participants is incorrect, as its values stay around the mid-30s, and the statement that musical performances were the lowest throughout overlooks their rise to 18. The overview is also unclear and does not compare the main changes precisely. To strengthen the report, select the key trends and support them with accurate start-and-end figures rather than general comments about interest.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0
The response mentions the activities one by one, so a reader can identify the general subject of each sentence. However, the information is not arranged into a clear overview followed by logically grouped details, and the progression is difficult to follow. For example, the discussion moves from film club to musical performances, table tennis, amateur dramatics, and martial arts, then returns to film club. Linking phrases such as “The other one” and “That's one” do not make the relationships between ideas clear, while repeated statements about members’ interest add little information. Organise the report into an introduction, a concise overview, and detail paragraphs that group rising, falling, or relatively stable activities.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
You use some task-related vocabulary, including “participants,” “interested,” and “lost,” and the activity names help convey the graph’s subject. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or unclear, such as “members lost interested,” “show interested,” and “Film term.” Spelling errors—including “Melbourune,” “culb,” “feathure,” and “performence”—also make the writing less clear and reduce precision. Aim to use standard graph language consistently: describe numbers as rising, falling, remaining stable, or fluctuating, and refer to “participants” rather than switching between “members” and “person.” Proofreading activity names and common reporting phrases would improve clarity.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
Most sentences use simple structures, and there are attempts to connect ideas with “but” and “because.” However, errors in sentence formation and basic grammar occur frequently, sometimes making the meaning difficult to follow. For example, “The given line graph represent” has subject–verb disagreement, while “The film culb have highest participants” lacks an article and uses an incorrect verb form. The sentence “The members are equal in every session in every years” is also grammatically unclear. Punctuation and spacing are inconsistent, with several sentences run together. Practise accurate simple sentences first, especially subject–verb agreement, articles, plural forms, and complete sentence boundaries, before adding more complex structures.
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