Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-11-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The given graph illustrate the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020. There are many kinds of activities like; film club, maritial arts, amateur dramatics, table tennis, musical performances. The given graph highlights that 2020 year has the highest number of participants in Melbourne. The activity is Film clubs. We can say that this is the highest number holding activites in 2020. The given graph also highlights that over the years the number of participants on the activites of Amateur dramatics decrases over the years. We can notice that from 2000 to 2020 Film clubs activites has increased the highest number of participants and Amateur dramatics has decrease the highest number of participants. It is highlighted that most of the activites is between 50 to 12 participants.

participants of the activities depend on the taste of the living people of the local area.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the chart’s subject and mention two genuine overall patterns: film-club participation is highest by 2020, while amateur dramatics declines. However, the response reports very little of the data and includes an unsupported claim that 2020 has the highest number of participants overall; the chart shows film club is highest, but its figure is slightly below its 2000 level only? In fact, it rises to about 66, its peak. The statement that most activities are “between 50 to 12 participants” is unclear and does not accurately summarise the series. You also omit the sharp rise in table tennis and the introduction and growth of musical performances. The response is 135 words, below the 150-word minimum. Add a clear overview and compare key figures and trends across the period.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response has a basic sequence: it introduces the graph, gives a few observations, and ends with a general comment. However, ideas are not arranged into clear paragraphs, and the progression between them is weak. Repeated openings such as “The given graph highlights” and “We can notice” make the writing feel repetitive rather than guiding the reader through comparisons. The final sentence about local people’s tastes is not connected to the chart’s reported data. To improve, use a short introduction, a distinct overview, and one or two body paragraphs grouped by trends—for example, the consistently high film-club figures and the contrasting rise in table tennis versus the decline in amateur dramatics. Use linking phrases to show these comparisons.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant chart vocabulary, including “participants,” “increased,” “decrease,” and “highest number,” so the topic is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several phrases are repeated, particularly “given graph” and “number of participants.” Some word choices are imprecise or unnatural, such as “highest number holding activites” and “most of the activites is between 50 to 12 participants,” which make the intended meaning difficult to follow. There are also spelling errors, including “maritial,” “activites,” and “decrases.” Build a more precise set of terms for describing data, such as “rose steadily,” “fell sharply,” “remained relatively stable,” and “reached a peak,” and check spelling before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

Most sentences use simple structures, and the reader can understand the general topic and the two main trends you mention. However, grammatical errors occur frequently, and the range of sentence forms is limited. For example, “The given graph illustrate” has a subject–verb agreement error, while “Film clubs activites has increased” has problems with agreement and sentence structure. “Amateur dramatics has decrease” uses an incorrect verb form, and “most of the activites is” also has faulty agreement. The sentence beginning “There are many kinds of activities like” is not punctuated or structured effectively. Practise accurate past-tense reporting and agreement, then combine simple statements into controlled comparison sentences, such as “While film-club numbers rose slightly, amateur dramatics declined substantially.”

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