Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-11-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

This line graph illustrates informaton on the numbers of participants for different activities such as film club, Martial arts, table tennis, amateur dramatics and musical perfomances in Melbourne city of Australia between period of 2000 to 2020.

Overall, film club activity shows highest number of participants and its number fluctuate little but after it returns to same number while musical performance shows lower number of participants in the begining but it increase little bit. Morever, martial arts participants number also fluctuate and no major change occur nevertheless table tennis surges dramatically.

Firstly, Film club has highest number and thesewere almost 65 participants in 2000 it fluctuate in 2010 but it return to same number in 2020. while martial arts participants number were almost 35 in 2000 and it also fluctuate then return to same number in 2020 that were in 2000 while Table tennis participants number were almost 17 in 2000 but after 2010 its number dramatically rose to almost 55 in 2020.

Participants in Amateur dramatics declined to almost 25 to 5 number while muscial performances showed little increase in their numbers from 2005 and in 2020 its number incrase to almost 15.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You identify the main overall patterns: the film club remains the most popular activity, table tennis rises sharply, and amateur dramatics declines. You also include relevant figures, such as table tennis reaching about 55 participants in 2020 and amateur dramatics falling to around 5–6. This covers the task well, with the overview and comparisons showing some of the broader synthesis expected at a stronger level. However, some details are imprecise: the film club falls slightly to about 60 in 2010 before rising to 66, rather than returning to its 2000 figure, and musical performances begin at zero in 2000, not only from 2005. The account of their increase is also underdeveloped. More precise reporting of these changes would strengthen the response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs describing the figures. This gives the reader a sensible route through the information, and grouping film club, martial arts and table tennis before the remaining activities is broadly effective. However, several long sentences combine multiple series and changes, making comparisons harder to follow. For example, the paragraph beginning “Firstly” moves from film club to martial arts and then table tennis in one extended sentence. Linking words such as “while,” “but,” and “nevertheless” are sometimes repeated or used awkwardly, and “after it returns” has an unclear reference. Use shorter sentences, group activities by similar trends, and make references explicit to improve progression and cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of task vocabulary, including “participants,” “fluctuate,” “declined,” and “surges dramatically,” so the main trends are generally understandable. There is some variation in how you describe change, but word choice and collocation are not consistently controlled. Phrases such as “its number fluctuate little,” “shows lower number,” and “increase little bit” sound unnatural, while “return to same number” does not accurately describe the film club trend. Spelling errors—including “informaton,” “perfomances,” “begining,” and “incrase”—also reduce accuracy. Aim for precise, natural expressions such as “the figure fluctuated slightly,” “the lowest figure,” and “rose gradually,” and check spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences with clauses linked by “while,” “but,” and “nevertheless,” showing some range. However, control is uneven, especially in the longer sentences, and errors sometimes make relationships between ideas difficult to follow. Examples include “its number fluctuate little,” “it increase little bit,” and “no major change occur,” where subject–verb agreement and verb forms are incorrect. Articles and sentence boundaries also need attention: “shows highest number” lacks an article, and the sentence beginning “while martial arts” should not continue after a full stop with a lowercase opening. Practise accurate past-tense reporting and agreement, and divide multi-activity comparisons into shorter, correctly punctuated sentences.

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