Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-07-26

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph provides the data on the number of people for various activities at one centre in Melbourne, Australia for the time period of 2000 to 2020.

Overall, it is evident that the film club accounted for the highest numbers of participation throughout the years. In contrast, Amateur dramatics participants decreased significantly. while, Martial arts fluctuated and table tennis at the end grew sharply.

As,it is shown in the line graph that film club showed the highest participation of people throughout the years. it remained between the 65 to 70 numbers from 2000 to 2020. in 2000, amateur dramatic`s participants raised till 2005, then it dropped steadily. in 2005, it had 30 participants then it fell to 5.

moreover, martial arts fluctuated in whole period, and it stayed between 30 to 40 participants. in contrast, table tennis had approximately 20 people, till 2010 but after it showed significant increase and reached at 55. in the case of musical performances it also remained at lower figure. it started from 2005 and reached at 20 number in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The response covers all the main features of the graph, including the trends for each activity. You successfully identified the highest participation (film club) and the significant changes in table tennis and amateur dramatics. However, the overview is slightly disjointed due to punctuation errors, and some data points could be more precise. For instance, stating 'it remained between 65 to 70' is a good summary, but the description of the musical performances could be more clearly integrated into the overall trend analysis. You have addressed all parts of the task effectively, providing a clear summary of the data provided.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the information. You use some cohesive devices like 'In contrast', 'moreover', and 'overall', which are appropriate for this task. However, the flow is occasionally interrupted by mechanical errors in punctuation and sentence structure, such as starting sentences with lowercase letters or using unnecessary commas (e.g., 'As,it is shown'). Improving the transition between sentences would help the text feel more cohesive and professional. The paragraphing is sufficient, but the internal structure of the paragraphs needs more refinement to ensure a smoother progression of ideas.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'fluctuated', 'sharply', 'steadily', and 'significant increase'. These are appropriate for describing trends in a graph. There are some minor errors in word choice and form, such as 'amateur dramatic`s' (should be 'amateur dramatics') and 'reached at 20 number' (should be 'reached 20'). While you attempt to use more specific vocabulary, some phrasing remains slightly repetitive or imprecise. To reach a higher band, focus on using more varied collocations and ensuring that nouns and verbs are used correctly in context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you successfully convey the information, there are frequent errors in punctuation, capitalization, and sentence boundaries (e.g., 'As,it is shown... it remained...'). These errors are noticeable but do not prevent the reader from understanding the data. You have attempted some complex structures, but they are often marred by grammatical slips, such as 'reached at 55' instead of 'reached 55'. To improve, focus on consistent capitalization, correct preposition usage, and ensuring that your sentences are clearly demarcated with proper punctuation.

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