Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-07-28
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
The line graph compares the number of participants for various activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia between 2000 and 2020
Overall,Flim club remained the highest, where as music perfomances experienced the greatest decrease over the time period, while other group of activities displayed fluctuation over the year
Flim club accounted for the largest number of participant at around 65, before it falling to 60% in 2010. It then rose to as same level as the beginning. Despite this change it remained dominant category. By contrast Amateur dramatics followed the opposite pattern decreasing from 25% to nearly 5%.
Turning to the remaining categories,the figure for table tennis grew steadily then at the 2010 it increased dramatically from nearly 20% to 50% in year 2020, while the martial arts remains same over the period. Finally, there was no participants for musical performance at the year 2005 there are some participant and it rose steadily over the year,which accounted for 18% in 2020
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response covers the main features of the graph, including the overall trends and specific data points. However, there are some inaccuracies in the reporting of the data. For instance, you mention that the 'Film club' fell to 60% in 2010, but the graph shows the unit is 'number of participants,' not percentages. Additionally, the description of the musical performance trend is slightly confusing, as the graph shows a clear starting point in 2000. To improve, ensure you accurately identify the units of measurement and provide a more precise summary of the key trends, such as the dramatic growth in table tennis, which is a significant feature of the data.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Turning to,' 'By contrast,' and 'Finally' to guide the reader. However, the flow is occasionally hindered by mechanical phrasing and some awkward transitions. For example, the sentence 'Overall, Flim club remained the highest, where as music perfomances experienced the greatest decrease' contains a spelling error and a slight misuse of 'whereas.' Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would help elevate the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'dominant category,' 'fluctuation,' and 'dramatically.' However, there are several spelling errors, such as 'Flim' instead of 'Film' and 'perfomances' instead of 'performances.' Additionally, there is some repetition of basic structures and occasional word-choice inaccuracies, such as using 'as same level' instead of 'the same level.' To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise vocabulary to describe trends and ensure you proofread for common spelling mistakes.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is appropriate for this task. There are several grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('the martial arts remains same') and tense inconsistencies ('there was no participants... there are some participant'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with missing spaces after commas. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur frequently enough to affect the overall clarity. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and consistent tense usage when describing past trends will significantly improve your accuracy.
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