Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-07-28
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
The graph depicts the rise and fall of appearing participants in various activities at a social centre in Melbourne, Australia between the years 2000 to 2020.
At first glance, it's very evident that the Film club has be been the activity with the most amount of members, as it always seems to stay stagnant throughout the 20 years.
The club with the least amount of attendees in the year 2000 was the Table tennis club but we get to see a huge surge in numbers from 2010 to 2020 making it the second most popular club.
On the other hand, the club that faced the most amount of participants leave was the Amateur dramatics, as it was the third most popular club in 2000 but started to decline rapidly after 2005.
The Martial arts club had a odd pattern to it as it's number of partakers seem to be always in a constant state of cadence overall the 20 years.
Finally, we see the emergence of a new club called Musical performances, in the year of 2005 which seems to be growing in a gradual manner year by year.
In conclusion, the activity with the least amount of participants was the Amateur dramatics, next the Musical performances, then the Martial arts and the Table tennis becomes the second most popular. The Film club remains to be the most popular club.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response covers all parts of the task and provides a clear overview of the trends. You successfully identified the main features, such as the Film club's stability and the growth of Table tennis. However, the analysis is somewhat descriptive rather than analytical. For instance, you list the clubs in the conclusion rather than synthesizing the data to highlight the most significant changes or contrasts. To reach a higher band, ensure you provide more precise data points (e.g., specific numbers or years) to support your observations, as the current description relies heavily on general terms like 'huge surge' or 'gradual manner' without referencing the actual figures provided in the graph.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0
The response is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'At first glance', 'On the other hand', and 'Finally', which help guide the reader. However, the connection between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the concluding paragraph is slightly repetitive, as it essentially lists information already presented. To improve, try to use a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear focus, avoiding the listing of data in the conclusion, which should instead summarize the most important trends.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'stagnant', 'surge', 'decline', and 'emergence'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'appearing participants', 'most amount of members', and 'constant state of cadence'. These errors do not impede communication, but they do limit the precision of your writing. To improve, focus on learning collocations (e.g., 'number of participants' instead of 'amount of participants') and using more academic vocabulary to describe trends, such as 'fluctuated' instead of 'constant state of cadence'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Examples include 'has be been', 'it's number of partakers' (should be 'its'), and 'overall the 20 years' (should be 'over'). Additionally, there are issues with subject-verb agreement and article usage. While these errors rarely prevent the reader from understanding your meaning, they are frequent enough to keep the score in the 6.0 range. Focusing on proofreading for basic errors like 'it's/its' and ensuring consistent verb tenses will help you achieve a higher band.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.