Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-01
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
''The graph illustrates the increasing numbers of participants for various activities on social center particullarly, in Melbourne, Australia between for the time period 2000 to 2020. how significantly participants, activly participate the film club, Martial arts, Amateur dramatics, Table tennis, Musical performances.
First of all, the increasing numbers of participants joined the film club in 2000, the ratio is increasingly in 70 persent. the persentage slightly down back in 2010, and then reverse smothly back toward in 2015.
on the other hand, Martial arts and Amateur dramatics firstly improved together in 2000, and in 2010 the persentage bring out the strenght. The Ameteur dramatics down in 2015 to 2020.
Furthermore, Table tennis 2000 ratio in 20 persent and in 2010, participants moved normally and instantely the persentage is drawback in 2020. Moreover, Martial arts fluctuationaly moved and drag in 2020.
Overall, that Musical performances in 2000 the ration is zero but in 2005 the persentage started and moved slightly between in 2010 to 2015 and in 2010 the percentage is same.
Finally, to much considerably the numbers of participants fluctuations depend on time period.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response attempts to address the task by describing the trends in participation for various activities. However, the information provided is often inaccurate or confusing. For example, the description of the film club's trend is difficult to follow, and the mention of '70 persent' does not clearly align with standard graph interpretation. The overview is missing, and the summary of main features is disjointed. The response lacks a clear, analytical approach, and the data points mentioned are frequently unclear or contradictory, making it difficult for the reader to grasp the overall trends. To improve, focus on identifying clear peaks, troughs, and overall trajectories rather than listing individual points.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is divided into paragraphs, which is a positive step. However, the logical progression of ideas is weak. The use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or misused, such as 'First of all', 'on the other hand', and 'Finally', which do not always logically connect the sentences. Referencing is also unclear, particularly when discussing the different activities. The flow between sentences is frequently interrupted by grammatical errors and awkward phrasing, which makes the text difficult to follow. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear, singular focus would significantly enhance the coherence of the writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary range is limited and repetitive. There are frequent spelling errors, such as 'particullarly', 'activly', 'persent', 'smothly', 'Ameteur', and 'fluctuationaly'. The word choice is often imprecise, such as 'bring out the strenght' or 'drag in 2020', which does not accurately describe statistical trends. The student relies on basic terminology and struggles to use academic language appropriate for a report. To reach a higher band, the student should focus on learning specific vocabulary for describing trends, such as 'fluctuate', 'decline', 'peak', and 'gradual increase', and pay closer attention to spelling and word formation.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a high frequency of grammatical errors that often impede communication. There are significant issues with sentence structure, subject-verb agreement, and tense usage (e.g., 'the ratio is increasingly in 70 persent', 'the persentage slightly down back'). Many sentences are fragmented or lack a clear subject and verb. While there is an attempt to use complex structures, they are frequently faulty, leading to confusion. The punctuation is also inconsistent. To improve, the student needs to focus on basic sentence construction, ensuring every sentence has a clear subject and verb, and practicing the correct use of tenses when describing past data.
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