Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-04
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph compares the number of attendees for various activities, namely Film club, Martial arts, Amateur dramatics, Table tennis, and Musical performances at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia over the 20-year period between 2000 to 2020.
Overall, the number of participants in Film club remained the highest, whereas the other activities experienced a fluctuating trend.
In 2000, the attendees in Film club was the highest, at roughly 65, followed by Martial arts and Amateur dramatics, at approximately 38 and 25, respectively.
It’s interesting to note that, while the number of those participating in Film club remained the highest despite their slightly declining in 2010, the others fluctuated, in distance, Amateur dramatics had a slight increase, in the same year, before declining significantly since then.
From 2010, the participants in table tennis increased notably from 20 to around 60 people, in 2020, overtook, Amateur dramatics that had a significant decrease.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the graph, including the overall trend and specific data points. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. While you identified the highest activity and the fluctuations, the description of the data is occasionally imprecise, such as the vague phrase 'in distance' and the confusing sentence structure regarding the 2010 data. To reach a higher band, ensure that comparisons are made more clearly and that the data points are described with greater accuracy. The overview is present but could be more effectively integrated to highlight the most significant trends across the entire period.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices. However, the flow is occasionally disrupted by awkward phrasing and punctuation errors, such as the comma splices and the fragmented sentence structure in the final paragraph ('in 2020, overtook, Amateur dramatics'). The use of linking words is sometimes mechanical, and the relationship between ideas is not always smooth. Improving the transition between sentences and ensuring that referencing is clear would significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You have a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey the main points, using terms like 'fluctuating trend', 'participants', and 'attendees'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'in distance' and 'their slightly declining'. These errors do not impede communication, but they do limit the precision of your report. To improve, focus on using more precise reporting verbs and nouns, and ensure that your collocations are natural. Expanding your range of synonyms for 'increase' and 'decrease' would also be beneficial.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('the attendees... was the highest') and incorrect verb forms ('despite their slightly declining'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the unnecessary commas in the final paragraph. While the meaning remains clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. Focus on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and ensuring that complex sentences are constructed with correct grammatical subordination.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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