Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-07
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.0)
The figure illustrates the information about the number of participants for different activities at one social Centre in Melbourne, Australia for the time period 2000 to 2020 respectively.
Overall, it is clear that the graph illustrates the number of participants in the following years 2000,2005,2010 and 2015,2020.
Looking first at the time period of 2000, the line indicates a percentage of 75 percent which jumps down to 73% in 2005, and
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 3.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 3.0
The response is significantly under the 150-word minimum requirement, which severely limits the ability to address the task. The writing stops abruptly after only 71 words, failing to report on the main features or make necessary comparisons across the full period. Because the response is incomplete, it cannot provide a clear overview or sufficient data coverage. To improve, you must ensure you describe all categories shown in the graph and provide a full analysis of the trends, rather than just starting the description. The current length prevents a higher score as the task is not addressed.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The response lacks a logical structure due to its incomplete nature. While there is an attempt at an introduction and an 'overall' statement, the lack of a body paragraph means there is no progression of ideas. The use of cohesive devices is minimal, and the abrupt ending makes the text feel disjointed. To improve, ensure you have a clear introduction, an overview paragraph, and at least two body paragraphs that group data logically. Using transition words like 'In contrast' or 'Furthermore' would help connect your points once the content is fully developed.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.0
The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive. Phrases like 'the figure illustrates' and 'the line indicates' are standard, but the range is too limited to demonstrate flexibility. There is also a lack of precision in describing the data; for example, referring to a 'percentage' when the graph likely shows raw numbers of participants. To improve, aim to use a wider variety of verbs and nouns to describe trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', or 'experienced a significant decline'. Avoid repeating the same sentence structures.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The response contains basic grammatical errors, such as the redundant use of 'respectively' at the end of the first sentence and inconsistent punctuation (e.g., '2000,2005'). The sentence structure is simple, and the unfinished sentence at the end demonstrates a lack of control. To improve, focus on using a mix of simple and complex sentences. Ensure that your punctuation is accurate and that you proofread for minor errors like missing spaces after commas. Developing more complex sentence structures will help you achieve a higher band score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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