Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-08
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The bar chart compares the numbers of people participate in five different activities at community hall in Melbourne, Australia between 2000 and 2020.
Overall, the film club has the highest number of participants throughout the period. Table tennis and musical performances enrollment increased while amateur dramatics decreased and Martial arts remained stable.
In 2000, around 65 people participate in Film club activity, this trend remain unchanged till the year 2000. Same pattern follow by Martial arts, it started at approximately 35 to peaked at roughly 40 and ended at below 40. Amateur dramatics participants initial around 25, after that it fell dramatically to less than 10 in 2020.
Regarding Table tennis and musical performances, in 2000 the numbers of people take part in table tennis at approx 15. It remained stable till 2010 before risiing drastically to more than half at the end. On the other hand there were nill participation in music till 2005. This trend after grew to roughly 12 in 2010. It rose steadily to end of period and reached to below 20 people.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response covers all key features of the graph, including the overall trends and specific data points. You successfully identified the highest participant group and contrasted the growth of table tennis with the decline of amateur dramatics. However, the overview is slightly hampered by minor inaccuracies, such as stating the film club trend remained unchanged until 2000, which is redundant given the starting point. To reach a higher band, ensure that comparisons are more explicit and that the overview provides a clearer summary of the most significant trends rather than just listing individual movements. The data selection is generally accurate and supports the main features well.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Overall', 'In 2000', and 'On the other hand' to guide the reader. However, the flow is occasionally interrupted by mechanical phrasing and some awkward transitions between sentences. For example, the transition between the discussion of martial arts and amateur dramatics is a bit abrupt. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear thematic focus would enhance the overall coherence of the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'dramatically', 'peaked', and 'remained stable'. However, there are several instances of word-choice errors and awkward phrasing, such as 'nill participation' (nil) and 'risiiing' (spelling error). Additionally, 'numbers of people take part in' is somewhat repetitive and could be replaced with more precise academic terminology. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the message, it lacks the precision and flexibility required for a higher band score. Focus on using more sophisticated collocations related to data description.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('people participate' instead of 'participated'), tense inconsistencies ('this trend remain' instead of 'remained'), and missing articles or prepositions ('at approx 15'). While the meaning is generally clear, these persistent errors in basic grammar and verb forms prevent the response from reaching a higher band. You should focus on proofreading for tense consistency and ensuring that subjects and verbs agree throughout your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.