Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-11
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The given line graph illustrates the proportion of data regarding different activities held in the social center at Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
It is clear from the graph that in the year 2000 the film club was considered a popular activity as it had around 63 participants. On the other hand Musical performance did not have a single participant. There were 15 and 25 number of participants in activities of table tennis and Amateur dramatics , martial art had 38 number of participants. From the year 2005 to 2010 participants of film club fell down to 60 meanwhile, musical performances participants increased smoothly to 10. Table tennis and Amateur dramatics fluctuated in 2005 but became equal to 20 number of participants in 2010, martial art also increased its number of participants from 31 to 39 in a 5 years of span.
Number of participants shot up sharply from 20 to 55 in the span of 2015 to 2020. On the other side participants number dropped suddenly for amateur dramatics till the year 2020. Film club had not shown much variation in terms of participants like musical performances and martial art where it increased to 20 and 38 number of participants respectively.
To conclude, film club is considered as the popular among the people in comparison to all, also there had been a rise in playing table tennis.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the graph, but the reporting is inconsistent and lacks precision. While you identify the starting points and some trends, the description of the data is often confusing. For instance, you mention 'Number of participants shot up sharply' in the third paragraph without specifying which activity you are referring to, which makes the information difficult to follow. Additionally, the overview is weak; it does not clearly highlight the overall trends or the most significant changes across the 20-year period. To improve, ensure that every data point mentioned is clearly linked to the specific activity and provide a more comprehensive summary of the overall patterns rather than just listing individual figures.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which is a positive step. However, the logical progression is frequently interrupted by unclear referencing. For example, in the third paragraph, you refer to 'Number of participants' without identifying the activity, forcing the reader to guess. Cohesive devices are used, but they are often mechanical or misused, such as 'On the other side' used to contrast trends rather than locations. The transition between years and activities is somewhat disjointed, making the flow of information feel repetitive. Improving the use of cohesive devices to link sentences and ensuring that subjects are clearly identified would significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision required for a higher band. You rely on basic descriptors like 'increased' and 'fell down' repeatedly. There are also some awkward collocations and phrasing, such as 'in a 5 years of span' and 'the proportion of data regarding different activities'. While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of variety and the occasional misuse of terms limit the score. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', or 'experienced a significant surge', and ensure your word choices are contextually accurate.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Issues include incorrect article usage ('the musical performances participants'), subject-verb agreement errors, and awkward phrasing ('film club had not shown much variation in terms of participants like musical performances'). Punctuation is generally functional, but the sentence construction is often clunky. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence structures and proofreading for common errors like pluralisation and preposition usage. Increasing the variety of complex structures while maintaining accuracy will help you achieve a higher band score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.