Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

This graph illustrates the data on numerous participants for several activities at one social central in cities like Melbourne , Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

In 2000, film club initiated from sixty five percent contestants which encountered a gradual decline and increment till 2020.

Contrary to it , amateur dramatics attendees range commenced from twenty seven percent which faced constant decrement of participants and remained about ten percent in 2020.

Table tennis began from approximately twenty percent subjects and inclined further and faced a dramatic surge in the year 2010 and kept increasing which at the end of period peaked fifty percent subjects

Martial arts individuals were about thirty six percent at the commencing stage which fluctuated slightly through the period.

Ultimately, the average participants for musical instruments were zero which drastically increased substantially in the period 2005 and were constant in upcoming years , fifteen percent at the end of period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers the main features of the graph, including the trends for all five activities. However, the overview is missing; a summary should highlight the most significant trends (e.g., the overall growth in participation for most activities) rather than just listing data points. Some data reporting is inaccurate or confusing, such as describing the film club as having 'sixty five percent contestants' when the graph likely refers to numbers, and the description of the musical instruments starting at 'zero' is slightly imprecise. To improve, ensure you provide a clear summary paragraph and focus on comparing the activities rather than describing each one in isolation.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The response is organised into separate paragraphs for each activity, which helps with readability. However, the logical progression is weak because there is no clear overview or synthesis of the data. The use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive (e.g., 'In 2000', 'Contrary to it', 'Ultimately'). The transition between sentences is often abrupt, and the lack of a concluding summary makes the overall structure feel like a list of observations rather than a cohesive report. Using a wider variety of linking words and grouping related trends would improve the flow significantly.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is somewhat limited and occasionally inaccurate. Phrases like 'initiated from sixty five percent contestants' and 'subjects' are not appropriate for describing graph data. The word 'increment' is used incorrectly in the context of a decline. While there is an attempt to use descriptive verbs like 'fluctuated' and 'surged', the overall control of collocation is weak. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise terminology for trends, such as 'commenced at', 'experienced a decline', or 'reached a peak of'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. There are issues with article usage ('the film club'), prepositional errors ('at the commencing stage'), and awkward phrasing ('participants for musical instruments were zero'). Sentence structures are generally simple, and there is a lack of complex sentence forms. Subject-verb agreement is also inconsistent. To improve, work on sentence variety and ensure that your verb tenses are consistent when describing past trends. Proofreading for basic errors like missing articles and incorrect word forms will help raise your score.

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