Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-14
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph illustrates the information the indivisuals which participated at social centres in melbourne, australia in their several activities between 2000 to 2020.
Overall, the film culb amd martal arts both number of candidates were fulctuated. However the table tennis club participants rose sharply after 2010 whereas amateur club numbers of participants sharlpy decrese in 2005.
Firstly, the highest numbers of players join film club up to 65 and the number of the players were fuctuated all over the years. The second fluctuation moment was observed in martial art club intitially 35 to 40 members join it between 2000 to 2020.
Moreover, a steep decline was observed in the ameteur dramatics in the starts the number of participants were 25 but after the significant decrease the number of members reduces to 5 in contrast a sharp increment was experienced by the table temnis in 2010 both clubs amateur and tennis was on the same point and a sharp rise was observed in tennis club. Furthermore, people start joining the musical club in 2005 and a slight increase was shown
In summary, film club secures high numbers of members in all the years whereas, amateur dramatics experienced a downfall after 2005.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the graph, such as the trends for the film club and the amateur dramatics. However, the reporting is inconsistent. While you identify the rise in table tennis and the decline in amateur dramatics, the description of the data is often imprecise. For instance, stating that the film club numbers 'fluctuated' is vague without referencing specific peaks or troughs. Additionally, the overview is somewhat repetitive and lacks a clear, concise summary of the most significant trends. To improve, ensure you provide specific data points to support your observations and focus on comparing the categories more effectively rather than listing them individually.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. Phrases like 'The second fluctuation moment' and 'in the starts' feel unnatural and do not effectively link ideas. The progression of information is sometimes disjointed, particularly in the third paragraph where the transition between the amateur dramatics and the table tennis club is abrupt. Improving the use of linking words such as 'consequently', 'meanwhile', or 'in contrast' would help create a smoother flow between sentences and paragraphs.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
There is a limited range of vocabulary, and several spelling errors impede clarity, such as 'indivisuals', 'culb', 'martal', 'fulctuated', and 'sharlpy'. You rely on basic descriptors like 'number of candidates' or 'number of members' repeatedly. While you attempt to use some topic-specific vocabulary, the frequent spelling mistakes and incorrect word choices (e.g., 'candidates' instead of 'participants') suggest a need for more careful proofreading and a wider range of synonyms to describe trends, such as 'dramatically', 'gradually', or 'plateaued'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains a mix of simple and some attempted complex structures, but grammatical errors are frequent and often affect readability. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'amateur club numbers... decrese'), tense consistency (e.g., 'people start joining'), and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'the number of the players were fuctuated'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with missing commas in complex sentences. To reach a higher band, you should focus on mastering basic sentence construction and ensuring that your verb tenses remain consistent when describing past data.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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