Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-15
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line chart illustrates the proportion of individuals participated in various activities at the social centre of the Melbourne over the period
Overall,it is evident that the film club shows significant increase in participants,while table tennis players recorded the lowest proportion of participants
Turning to details , initially near about 18 participants took part in the table tennis ,while in 2005 approximately 65 people has took part in film club.The proportion of individuals marginal increase to 20 ,Meanwhile figure of film club shows negligible decrease.next , figure of martial art experienced minimally decline in 2005, before climbing to 40 in 2010.
Probing further,The amateur dramatics figure rose from 28 to 30 in 2005 .thereafter proportion of table tennis individuals climb in 2015 ,by contrast figure of Amateur dramatics plunged approximately to 15 . subsequently figure of music shows significant rise in 2015 and 2020,while martial art figure followed doward trend between 2015 and 2020 .lastly figure of film club hit the peak of 65 in 2020
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the graph, but the analysis is somewhat superficial. While you identify trends, the data points are often presented in a disjointed manner, making it difficult to follow the overall progression. You correctly identify the film club's growth and the table tennis figures, but the lack of clear comparison between categories limits the depth of the analysis. To improve, ensure you group data logically rather than listing individual points chronologically, and focus on highlighting the most significant trends or anomalies rather than attempting to describe every minor fluctuation.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay lacks a clear paragraph structure, which hinders the logical flow of information. While you use some cohesive devices like 'meanwhile' and 'by contrast', they are often used mechanically or incorrectly. The transition between sentences is frequently abrupt, and the lack of clear paragraph breaks makes the text feel like a single, dense block of information. To improve, organize your response into a clear introduction, an overview, and two distinct body paragraphs that group related trends together. Ensure that each sentence flows naturally into the next using a variety of linking words.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it is repetitive and lacks precision. You rely on basic verbs like 'shows', 'took part', and 'climb' throughout the response. There are also some awkward collocations, such as 'marginal increase to 20' and 'minimally decline', which sound unnatural. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more varied and precise vocabulary to describe trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'remained stable', or 'experienced a sharp decline'. Avoid repeating the same phrasing for different categories.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede readability. Issues include incorrect verb tenses (e.g., 'people has took part'), missing articles (e.g., 'at social centre of Melbourne'), and punctuation errors, such as missing spaces after commas and periods. The sentence structures are mostly simple, and attempts at more complex sentences often result in errors. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, consistent use of past tense for historical data, and correct punctuation. Proofreading your work for basic errors like missing articles and capitalization will significantly improve your score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.