Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The graph provides information on the number of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne , from the year 2000 to 2020.

Overall, The film club stood at first with greater number of participants over the period. The martial arts clubs participation rate kept fluctuating over the years. The musical performance activities kept increasing over the period. While the amateur dramatics activities showed an opposite trend Among others.

The participation proportion for the film activities remained at top with very little fluctuation in trend stating from approximately 63% in the yer 2000 while ending at almost 68% by the year 2020. Although the martial art participation proportion initiated from almost 35% in the year 2000, It ended up at almost the same proportion even after 20 years.

The musical performances started from the year 2005 and kept rising on until the year 2020. While amateur dramatics participation got some attention of the participants until the year 2005, after that it showed a dramatic decrease and ended at less than 10% participation rate after 15 years.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response covers all key features of the graph, including the trends for all four activities. You have successfully identified the main trends, such as the dominance of the film club and the decline in amateur dramatics. However, the analysis could be improved by providing more precise data points to support your comparisons. For instance, while you mention the film club started at 63% and ended at 68%, you could have explicitly compared this to the other activities at specific intervals to strengthen the 'comparison' aspect of the task. Overall, the information is clearly presented and the main features are well-selected.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. The progression of ideas is clear, and you use cohesive devices such as 'While', 'Although', and 'after that' to link your points. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the paragraphing could be more balanced. For example, the overview paragraph contains a mix of general trends and specific details that might be better placed in the body paragraphs. Improving the variety of linking phrases would help the flow feel more natural and sophisticated.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'fluctuating', 'participation rate', and 'dramatic decrease'. However, there are some minor inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'stood at first' (should be 'ranked first' or 'was the most popular') and 'stating from' (likely a typo for 'starting from'). To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more precise academic vocabulary and ensure that your word choices are consistently accurate. The current range is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly, but lacks the flexibility required for a higher score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While your meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors, such as 'The film club stood at first with greater number' (missing article 'a') and 'the yer 2000' (spelling error). Additionally, there are some punctuation issues, such as unnecessary capitalization in 'Overall, The film club'. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and article usage will help improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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