Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-18
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The graph below illustrates the participant's numbers who took part in different activities in Melbourne at one social centre from 2000 to 2020.
Overall, Majority of people participated in film club and table tennis participants figures climbed over a period of time .In contrast least number of people enrolled in table tennis and didn't grow much till the end of the period.
In the year 2000 about 65 people participated in film club which was the highest proportion among other people .The number fell slightly in the year 2010 by 60 which remained similar till 2020. Whereas , figures for martial arts participants were 38 in 2020 which fluctuated from 2005 to 2020 with the proportion of approximately 33, 40,and remained almost similar till the end by less than 40 respectively. In the beginning there were only 17 people who took part in table tennis which increased sharply in the year 2015 by 38 and surged by 50 in the year 2020.
In contrast, musical performances started in the year 2005 and there were no participants in this year .From the year 2010 number of participants reached 10 which followed a upward trend over the period of 20 years.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response covers all parts of the task and provides a clear overview. However, there are inaccuracies in data reporting. For instance, you state that table tennis had the 'least number of people' in the overview, but the graph shows musical performances started at zero. Additionally, the description of the martial arts data is confusing and lacks precision, particularly when referencing specific years and figures. While you identify main trends, the data interpretation needs to be more accurate to reach a higher band. Ensure that your summary reflects the actual visual data provided rather than making contradictory statements.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the information. You use some cohesive devices such as 'In contrast', 'Whereas', and 'In the beginning'. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the logical progression is occasionally hindered by unclear referencing. For example, the transition between the overview and the body paragraphs is abrupt. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear thematic focus, such as grouping activities by their growth patterns rather than just listing them chronologically.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'fluctuated', 'surged', and 'upward trend'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'participant's numbers' (should be 'number of participants') and 'proportion of approximately 33, 40' (proportion is not the correct term for raw numbers). The vocabulary is generally sufficient to convey meaning, but it lacks the precision and sophistication required for higher bands. Focusing on using more precise terminology for data trends will enhance your score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation. Examples include 'Majority of people' (missing an article), 'fell slightly in the year 2010 by 60' (the preposition 'by' is misused here), and 'a upward trend' (should be 'an'). Additionally, there are issues with comma placement and sentence construction, such as 'Whereas , figures...'. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to limit the score. Focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles and prepositions.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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