Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-21
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph shows information on number of participants for five diffrent activities at a social center in Melbourne,Australia between 2000 to 2020.
Overall, the line graph containing information about diffrent activities like film club,martial arts,amateur dramatics,tennis lessons and musical performances of diffrent number of people involved in each during the time periode of 2000 to 2020 .the number of persons in film club fluctuated at around 65 during the years it has maximum number of person but the musical performance activity remains minimum in first half and then increased.
The film club with maximum number of persons remains almost at 65 persons including fluctuations during 2000 to 2015 and the martial arts also had fluctuated and remains around 36 persons it first decreased from 36 to around 30 then repeating all this procedure with time .the table tennis activity firstly having people involved aproximately 17 in 2000 in next four years the people begin to increase rapidly finaly reached near 60 people in 2020.
The amateur dramatics firstly was bellow 30 and with tie begin to decrease significantly and reached at around 8 persons while musical erformances starts to rise from zero in2005 and at the end inincreased by 20 persons .
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all parts of the task by identifying the main trends for the five activities. However, the overview is poorly constructed; it is a long, run-on sentence that fails to clearly highlight the most significant trends or contrasts. While the data is generally accurate, the description of the trends is sometimes repetitive and lacks analytical depth. For instance, describing the film club as having a 'maximum number of persons' is vague. To reach a higher band, you should provide a more concise and analytical overview that synthesizes the data rather than simply listing activities.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the flow of ideas is frequently disrupted by poor sentence structure and a lack of effective cohesive devices. Many sentences are run-on or lack necessary punctuation, making the progression of information feel mechanical. For example, the second paragraph is a single, confusing sentence that attempts to summarize too much information at once. Referencing is also inconsistent, and the transition between the introduction and the body paragraphs is weak. Improving the use of linking words like 'consequently', 'in contrast', or 'meanwhile' would significantly improve the logical flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive, with several spelling errors such as 'diffrent', 'periode', 'aproximately', and 'erformances'. You rely on basic phrasing like 'number of persons' repeatedly. There is little attempt to use a wider range of vocabulary to describe trends, such as 'plateaued', 'surged', or 'witnessed a steady decline'. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequent spelling mistakes and the lack of variety in word choice prevent the response from achieving a higher score. Focusing on synonyms and accurate spelling is essential for improvement.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors, including issues with subject-verb agreement, article usage, and sentence boundaries. Many sentences are run-on, such as 'the number of persons in film club fluctuated at around 65 during the years it has maximum number of person but the musical performance activity remains minimum in first half and then increased.' There is a lack of complex sentence structures, and the punctuation is often incorrect or missing entirely. These errors occasionally impede the reader's ability to follow the information smoothly. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for punctuation would be highly beneficial.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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