Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph describe the information about the proportion of participants for different activities at particular social center in Australalia melbourne in 2000 to 2020. The data celebrated in percentage.

At the first glance, it is vividly seen that the film club shows, at beginning it starts about 65%in 2000, but in 2005 to 2010 it shows little bit decrease around 64% to 60%.In 2020 it shows a small upward trend was only 65% which was the same at the starting. Secondly, in matrial art these trend showing zig zag trend it starting number was 37% but in 2020 it was also the same amount in end. In amateur dramatics it begin with 35% but after that it shows dropped dramatically aprroximately low of 5%.

Shifting towards to remaining data , In table tennis which starts by 27% and after 20 years it shows an amazing increase was 50%. In musical performences, it starts in 2010 with the amount by 15% but in 2020 they shows a up

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response covers the main features of the graph, but the analysis is incomplete. The overview is missing, and the conclusion is abrupt, as the final sentence is unfinished. While you identify trends for most activities, the description of the data is sometimes inaccurate (e.g., stating the film club was 65% in 2020 when the graph shows a different figure). To improve, ensure you provide a clear summary of the overall trends in the introduction and ensure all data points are accurately transcribed. You must also complete all sentences to ensure the reader can follow your analysis fully.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which is a positive step. However, the logical progression is hindered by awkward phrasing and a lack of cohesive devices. Transitions like 'At the first glance' and 'Shifting towards to remaining data' are used, but they feel mechanical and do not always connect ideas smoothly. The referencing is sometimes unclear, and the abrupt ending of the final sentence significantly disrupts the flow of the text. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear, unified focus.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The range of vocabulary is limited and often repetitive. You rely on basic verbs like 'shows' and 'starts' throughout the response. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'data celebrated in percentage' (should be 'expressed as a percentage') and 'matrial art' (spelling error). The use of 'zig zag trend' is informal and not appropriate for an academic report. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more precise vocabulary for describing trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', or 'experienced a significant surge'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'The line graph describe', 'they shows'), incorrect preposition usage, and sentence fragments. The structure is largely simple, and attempts at more complex sentences often result in errors, such as 'in 2005 to 2010 it shows little bit decrease around 64% to 60%'. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with spacing after commas and periods. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement would significantly improve your score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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