Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-21
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The line grpah illustrates how people took participate in different activities in the city of Australia between 2000 and 2020.
Overall, large number of individuals are constituted for film club activity whereas, the most dramatic increase has observed in table tennis while amateur dramatics fell consideably over the period.
In 2000, the number of individuals in film club was around to 65 which decreased in the middle of the period then increased to 70 at the end of the year while the participitants of table tennis was below 20 in the begining which increased to 20 in 2005 and remain stable to 2010 then sharply increased and rose to above 50 in 2020 that made it the second highest participants.
In terms of musical performance, the strength of participants was none from 2000 to 2005 but after this the individuals of this sector increased gradually and reached to around 15 in 2000. On the otherhand, the amateur participants sink dramaticlly from 15 to around 5 in 2000 making it the lowest over the year while martial arts fluctuated bwtween 30 and 40 participants.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response covers all key features of the graph, including the trends for film club, table tennis, musical performance, amateur dramatics, and martial arts. You successfully identified the main trends and made relevant comparisons, such as noting table tennis as the second-highest activity by 2020. However, there are some inaccuracies in data reporting; for instance, you mention musical performance reaching 15 in '2000' and amateur dramatics falling to 5 in '2000', which contradicts the timeline provided. To improve, ensure that the data points cited align precisely with the years on the x-axis. Overall, the summary is clear and addresses the prompt effectively.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. You use some cohesive devices such as 'In terms of', 'On the other hand', and 'while' to link ideas. However, the flow is occasionally disrupted by awkward phrasing and some mechanical errors in referencing. For example, the transition between the overview and the first body paragraph could be smoother. Paragraphing is used appropriately to group related information, which helps the reader follow the progression of the data. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of cohesive devices more naturally to connect sentences and ideas.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'dramatic increase', 'fluctuated', and 'remained stable'. However, there are several instances of word-choice errors and spelling mistakes, such as 'grpah', 'participitants', 'consideably', and 'dramaticlly'. Additionally, some phrasing is unnatural, such as 'the strength of participants was none' and 'individuals of this sector'. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding the main points, they do limit the precision of your report. Focusing on accurate spelling and more natural collocations will significantly improve your score in this criterion.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is a positive step. However, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('large number of individuals are constituted') and incorrect preposition usage ('participate in different activities' is fine, but 'remained stable to 2010' should be 'remained stable until 2010'). Some sentences are also slightly confusing due to punctuation and word order issues. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors means that your control over complex structures is not yet consistent. Focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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