Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-23
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
This diagram allows to show the information on the number of participants for different activities a one social center in Melbourne, Australia between 2000 to 2020.
The number of participants in table tennis has increased approximately 3 times higher in 2020 compared to the number of participants in 2000. Also, it showed the number of participant enormously increased in 2010 which marking as a turning point. Additionally, the number of participants in Amateur dramatics has sightly declined between 2000 to 2020. In addition to, people who have classes for Musical performances has increased between 2000 to 2020 which enables to show the high interest in musical over the time. Furthermore, number of participants in film club has steadily increased results between 2000 to 2020 which wasn’t quite comparable than other club activity. The most significant club in 2000 was Film and it didn’t changed over the year in 2020 also. The second most massive number of participants club enables to identify as a martial art both in 2000 and 2020 which results were able to maintained sightly below 40.
Overall, this graph provides useful information about the popularity of club types between 2000 to 2020. As for, Australia government, Melbourne city association, and social center representatives might review these diagram for improvement such as attracting more participants, offering services, increase satisfaction of customers, and even increase the investment in certain club activity. For example, they might recruit more professional instructors to provide more reliable information for huge number of participants. Therefore, this charts have significant privilege to assess customers demand.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to cover the main features, but the analysis is inconsistent and lacks clarity. While you identify trends for table tennis and amateur dramatics, the description of the film club and martial arts is confusing and inaccurate. For instance, stating the film club 'wasn't quite comparable than other club activity' is vague. Furthermore, the final paragraph includes irrelevant suggestions for the government and social center staff, which is not required for an Academic Task 1 report. You must focus solely on reporting the data provided in the graph rather than offering external recommendations or subjective analysis.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical flow is frequently disrupted by awkward phrasing and misused cohesive devices. Phrases like 'In addition to,' and 'As for,' are used incorrectly, making the transition between ideas feel mechanical and sometimes confusing. The referencing is also problematic; for example, 'it didn't changed over the year' lacks a clear antecedent. To improve, focus on using transition words that accurately reflect the relationship between your points, such as 'conversely' for contrasting trends or 'similarly' for parallel movements.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and often used inaccurately. You rely on repetitive structures and basic descriptors like 'massive' or 'high interest.' There are several instances of awkward collocations, such as 'enormously increased' and 'results were able to maintained.' Additionally, the word choice is often imprecise, such as using 'diagram' to refer to a line graph. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use more precise terminology for describing trends, such as 'fluctuated,' 'peaked,' or 'remained stable,' and ensure that your word choices are appropriate for a formal report.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There is a high frequency of grammatical errors throughout the text, which occasionally impedes communication. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('this charts have'), incorrect verb forms ('didn't changed'), and awkward sentence structures ('This diagram allows to show'). While you attempt some complex sentences, they are often marred by errors, such as 'which enables to show the high interest.' You need to focus on basic sentence construction and verb tense consistency before attempting more complex structures. Proofreading for common errors like pluralization and auxiliary verb usage would significantly improve your score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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