Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-23
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Participation in different activities conducted in Melbourne, Australia for 20 years is described below.
overall, the number of participation has increased of table tennis, whereas other groups have fluctuating numbers of participation.
The highest number of participation is visible by film club at between 60 to 70. whereas, Table tennis has shown a drastically increment in participation from 27 to above 50 in 2020. Further, musical performances have increased from 0 in 2015 to 19 in 2020. On the other hand, Amateur dramatics has fallen from 28 to below 10 over the period of time.
Consequently, martial arts group has been between 30 to 40 over the period of 20 years from 2000 to 2020. The only group which has drastically decreased is Amateur dramatics while all the other groups has increased or have been fluctuating numbers between the range of 10. Where, Musical group started participating from the year 2015.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the graph, such as the growth in table tennis and the decline in amateur dramatics. However, the overview is weak; it lacks a clear summary of the overall trends and contains inaccuracies, such as stating that all groups increased or fluctuated, which ignores the clear downward trend of amateur dramatics. Some data points are described vaguely, such as 'between 60 to 70', which lacks precision. To improve, ensure the overview highlights the most significant trends (e.g., the contrast between the rising popularity of table tennis and the decline of amateur dramatics) and use more precise data reporting to support your claims.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the flow between ideas is often mechanical. The use of cohesive devices like 'Consequently' is inappropriate in this context, as the decline of one group is not a result of the stability of another. Additionally, the referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the final paragraph where the sentence structure becomes repetitive and disjointed. To improve, focus on using transition words that accurately reflect the relationship between the data points (e.g., 'in contrast', 'meanwhile') and ensure that each paragraph has a clear, logical focus rather than jumping between different activities.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision required for higher bands. There are several errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'drastically increment' (should be 'drastic increase') and 'number of participation' (should be 'participation numbers'). The range of vocabulary is limited, relying on basic descriptors. To improve, focus on using more sophisticated reporting verbs and nouns, such as 'experienced a significant rise', 'witnessed a steady decline', or 'remained relatively stable'. Avoid using nouns where verbs are more appropriate and vice versa.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and some attempted complex structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally hinder clarity. Examples include 'all the other groups has increased' (subject-verb agreement error) and 'the number of participation has increased of table tennis' (incorrect preposition usage). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with some sentences starting with lowercase letters or lacking proper structure. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of prepositions when describing trends. Proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy will help ensure that your points are communicated clearly.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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