Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-23

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

 

 

Student answer (Band 4.0)

This paragraph illustrates that number of participants who were involved activities like film club, martial arts, amateur dramatics, table tennis, and musical performances from 2000 till 2020.

These activities was held in Melbourne, Australia.

In 2000, 60 above film club, Martial arts were 30plus and 20 plus Amateur dramatics were include also 10plus table tennis participents and a bit ups in 2020.

Musical performances in 2005 fluctuates

as well as Table tennis , Ameateur dramatics were same but the martial arts level increased in 2010.

Table tennis remain same in years but level ups in 2020 up to 50 participants.

In 2015 there were no as such changings

From 2020 to 2015, 10 participants performs Amateur dramatics a slightly ups in 2010 and remain same in 2005 also a quite decrease in 2000.

To sum up how diagrams shows the activities, performances all we disscussed in the above paragraphs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to provide a clear overview of the main trends and does not effectively select and report the key features of the graph. The data presentation is fragmented and lacks accuracy; for instance, the description of figures is vague (e.g., '60 above', '20 plus'), making it difficult for the reader to understand the actual information. Furthermore, the response is slightly under the minimum word count requirement. The analysis is disjointed and fails to make meaningful comparisons between the different activities over the twenty-year period, resulting in a failure to fully address the requirements of the task.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The essay lacks a logical structure. While there is an attempt at paragraphing, the ideas within the paragraphs do not follow a clear progression. There is a lack of cohesive devices to link sentences and ideas, making the text feel like a list of disconnected observations rather than a coherent report. The concluding sentence is also ineffective as it does not summarize the main features but instead refers back to the process of writing itself. The overall arrangement of information is confusing and hinders the reader's ability to follow the data trends.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.0

The vocabulary is very limited and repetitive, relying on basic terms like 'ups', 'level', and 'changings'. There is a lack of precision in describing data trends, such as using 'a bit ups' instead of 'a slight increase' or 'fluctuates' without context. The word choice is often informal or inaccurate, which prevents the expression of precise meanings. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to demonstrate the flexibility required for higher band scores, and the errors in word formation (e.g., 'participents') are noticeable.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The response contains frequent grammatical errors that impede communication. There are significant issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'These activities was held', 'Table tennis remain same'), incorrect tense usage, and awkward sentence structures. The writing relies heavily on simple, fragmented sentences, and there is a lack of complex structures. Punctuation is also inconsistent, and the overall control of grammar is weak, making the text difficult to read and understand in several places.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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